Giddy Up

Destination - Honeymoon

2006-04-27T15:05:00.000-06:00

Where Erik and I will be relaxing on our honeymoon ;) We are also still keeping our fingers crossed for a January 2007 trip to Costa Rica!! The Honeymoon starts the afternoon of Sept 9!! Plane tickets have already been bought!! YAHHOOOOO

I am alive

2006-04-26T10:37:00.000-06:00

Well I am here to report I am still alive, and honestly just figured out my password today so I could get back online. I figure I will jut try to update on as many things as I can think of since it has been FOREVER since the last blog.

1. Kyle & Danielle did not win the ESPN Marriage Madness. It was kind of a bummer, but the couple who won really deserved it. K&D are getting married sometime next fall.
2. My Bachelorette party in Vegas was more than I could have imagined. It was a blast and I can honestly say I have the best friends in the world. It was too good to be true to have everyone in the same area for a few days!! I miss my girls so much. My plan is for us all to eventually end up living close together. I need to see them more than a couple times a year!
3. EC is great! He finally got his raise ($7K more a year) which is EXCELLENT!! He is really working hard. He graduates Dec 23 with his double major in Management & Marketing. He is ready to be done with school and I cannot blame him. I am proud to say he has made the Dean's list every semester since the begining. He is so smart and has really worked hard over the past few years. Working full time and going to school full time is A LOT of work. In college I could barely go to school and work 10 hour weeks.
4. I got an ipod and I LOVE it. My only complaint is I got the 2G nano. I wish I would have got the 4G. I also got this mini speaker system so I can play my music at work!
5. The wedding is less than 5 months away!! Time is really flying by. I have my dress and I love it:) I actually picked up my veil this week. I was going to post the picture of me in my dress, but EC knows of my blog and though I am sure he doesn't read it much - I don't want to chance him seeing that picture. The bridesmaid dresses are ordered and the groomsmen ties are too!! Erik and I starting putting the invitations together the past few nights. It is all starting to seem so real. I am really excited!!

My schedule the month of May is crazy. Here is what it looks like:

May 1-5 : In Helena & Kalispell for work
May 10: EC's 26th Birthday
May 11-15 EC's Bachelor party in Chicago
May 16-21 - In Seattle for my annual Controller's meeting
May 26-29 - In Denver for a bridal shower and to see Poof, Pit, Pea & Mouse

Whew!

Work is going well. LOTS of changes are on the horizon and I am more than ready for them! I have been traveling quite a bit. Working on getting a car allowance, and getting another assistant in Missoula. We will see how that all pans out. I am ranked 16th nationwide out of 178 managers. They take the top 20 to Costa Rica for a week next Jan. My fingers are crossed, but I think it is a long shot. My goals are just too steep this year. Expecting DSO of around 29, and 78% collection is just almost unheard of in the industry. I am working hard, but it is tough. I just need the 15 manager in front of me to fall back a little ;) I'll keep you posted.

Well that is all for now. Back to the daily grind ;)

PEACE

Please vote for Kyle & Danielle!!!

2006-03-15T08:58:00.000-07:00

Hey Everyone!! Please go to http://espnradio.espn.go.com/espnradio/story?page=marriagemadness and vote for Kyle & Danielle in the wedding madness bracket. It is kind of like the NCAA tournament and Kyle has made it to the Sweet 16. I would LOVE to see him win!! Kyle is my Regional Credit Manager and is the BIGGEST Colts & Pacers fan I have ever met!! Thanks so much!!

My Ex is officially engaged

2006-03-13T13:34:00.000-07:00

Well it was a long time coming - but weird to hear about it none the less. EA got engaged this weekend to his GF of 4 years LG. Honestly I don't feel happy/sad anything about it. Just indifferent. I wish them both a happy life together.

Seems like my realtionship with him was a lifetime ago. I guess to some extent it was. Even though I had other long term boyfriends - I can honestly look back and say he was my first true love. No matter what happened in the past, or what will happen in my future - there will always be a small part of me that cares for him. I am not sure if that will ever go away. Its not "love" I feel for him - just a fondness for the time we had together.

I feel SO lucky to have found my EC and to have been with him for almost 4 years. He is really a wonderful man, and I know it was God's plan all along that I find him. I love him more than anything in this world and I am very excited to spend the rest of my life with him. I cannot believe the wedding is in less than 6 months! Where did all the time go? I am enjoying every day of being engaged and cannot wait for my Vegas bachelorette party in a few short weeks! I miss my girls and cannot wait to see them!

Break Away..........

2006-03-09T13:17:00.000-07:00

if melody
is my destiny
then what's left of me,i'll give to you..
and if next to me,
is all that you need to be
would you settle for fantasy,
if it's the best you could do?

can I have my cake?
can i have you too?
would you follow me?
could i ask you to?
would the world between us,
break these ties?
we worked so hardto realize..
can a postcard say,
what i see in your eyes?
could i ever break away?

would i be satisfied,
and find peace inside
rolling half my life
over broken white lines?
can i have my cake,
can i have you too?
would you follow me,
could i ask you too?

will i wake up one morning,
and see your face
and the streaks on the window,
that the rainstorm makes?
could you bear all the waiting,
and the strength that it takes?
could i ever break away?

could i ever break away?
can i have my cake?
can i have you too?
would you follow me?
could i ask you to?
would the world between us,
break these ties?
we worked so hard to realize..
can a postcard say,
what i see in your eyes?
could i ever break away?

could i ever break away?
away...away..

Having a bad day..........

2006-02-02T14:42:00.000-07:00

First off - look at how stinkin' cute my little sister & brother are! This was Halloween 2005. Tate didn't want to wear her hoodie underneath her "fairy angel" costume because she didn't think it looked as pretty - but when you live in Colorado sweats are a must! Doesn't Jack look hilarious? I am so in love with those little munchkins!

Basically today has been one of the worst days I have had in awhile. I am not feeling good, I cannot stand my job, my GM is an idiot, the wedding funding a la my parental units has run out leaving Erik and I to pay around 7k more, Erik's 1098E hasn't come in the mail yet for his school and he needs it for our tax appt, my step-mom & real mom hate each other so much I have to have 2 bridal showers just so they both can be there, my sister told me she is not even sure if she will make my bridal shower b/c she wants to make her summer plans with her fiance first, my first call this morning was a customer we wrote off cussing his head off at me, my asst is on my LAST nerVE and after working out the past week and eating like a bird I actually gained a pound since Friday :( WYF!?!? I am just in such a horrible mood.

I have to say that the one thing today that is keeping me from crying and just going home is the fact that I can honestly say I have the best friends in the world. I don't know where I would be without them. They are always there to listen to me and all my family BS, throw 2 bridal showers for me because of my pathetic family situation & make me laugh. EC has been super cute all day. He know I am just not having a good day and he took me out to lunch and keeps checking on me every couple hours.

My job lately just really sucks. I don't get paid enough to deal with all the shit that gets thrown my way. Sad part is I am amongst the higher paid managers for the MT/WY region. I really wish my GM would do us all a favor and quit (or get fired) which ever comes first. He makes everyone's job harder than it has to be. He is also easily the WORST manager I have ever worked for in my life. I don't feel like he cares what I do - or has any interest in what I do and he takes credit for my successes. He is never here, never answers voice mail, e-mail... it is so frustrating!! My Dad said that in a year or so he is going to be looking for a project manager to help him out down in Denver/Golden. He said he wants to recruit Erik to go down there and possibly take a position with him. **DEAR GOD - PLEASE MAKE THAT A REALITY!!** I would move to CO in a second. I love Montana, but I miss my friends, my Dad, Jacky & Tate...I think my company is an excellent company to work for - but this operation in MT is not what it is supposed to be. In fact I am not sure how much longer I can take the office politics that come with working in a place like this.

OK I need to get back to work. If this headache would just go away.........

I bought my dress! AHH!!!!!

2006-01-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

Well I did it - I bought my wedding dress! I won't post a picture of me in it - INCASE Erik decides to lurk around - but I attached a picture of it so you will get the idea. It is kind of hard to see the whole dress but it has a cathedral length train and the skirt has mini bustles all over it. They call it a "pick-up" skirt. I absolutely love the look of it. It should be in Montana in 16-20 weeks. The wedding dress makes my wedding seem VERY real to me. I am still a little overwhelmed by everything, but very excited!

Everything is coming together. The 2 main pieces we still don't have in place are the caterer & the alcohol. Other than that - we are ahead of schedule. I have had fun planning everything. Hard to believe in less than 9 months we will be married! I cannot wait!

My birthday was good. I think 26 will be a great year for me! ;) Big Sky, MT was also a BLAST for the New Year. We had such a good time! They had a great firework show. The DJ they had up there basically sucked rocks though. It was a mix of techno & elevator music. It is hard to describe - but it was so bad it literally sobered me up after drinking for 3 hours. There were a few people trying to dance, but they just looked funny. I think they realized how funny they looked and stopped "dancing" after about 3 min. If I find out who that DJ was I will post it here for a nationwide boycott. (Seriously it was THAT bad).

Well off to a sales meeting. Have a great rest of the week.

Guess Who is Getting Married?!?!?

2005-12-29T09:48:00.000-07:00

Yep - you heard it heard it hear first - Jessica & Mike are engaged!!! He asked her last night in the John Hancock Building. I just found out! I haven't even talked to her yet. (A little parent birdie told me about 30 min ago!) I ran out to the sales pit and told Erik right away! I cannot believe it! I am SO thrilled for her. Mike is wonderful. Super cute, smart & loves Jessica. From what I hear they will have a long engagement - and get married when he is either done with or finishing law school. (Jan 2009).

Hard to believe we BOTH got engaged in 2005. Not only that we both are engaged to Chicago boys. Weird. I hate to say this - but I REALLY hope that she doesn't steal my wedding thunder. Erik and I were together almost 3.5 years before he asked me and I just hope the next 9 months are not focused on her wedding. Is that mean?!? :(

Anywho - YAHOO for Jess. I am SUPER happy for her and think Mike is an excellent guy!

**I know, I know I NEVER blog anymore. Honestly I haven't had too much to say I guess. Plus I have been SUPER busy. We basically re-did all the lighting fixtures in our house, re-painted the kitchen, dining room, living room & downstairs bathroom. Whew!!

Christmas was GREAT! E & I just hung out up here in Billings and had a nice time. I got Erik a kick ass surround sound system, we got the treadmill we have wanted for months, a mini palm camcorder, clothes, cds, Cubs & Bears stuff--- we made out like bandits!

We are going to Big Sky, MT for the new year. Live bands, fireworks, alcohol - should be a great time! We will be back on Jan 2nd for my b-day. I cannot believe I will be 26 in a few days. Where does the time go?

Work is work. Nothing too exciting except I am now ranked 2nd nationwide - so Costa Rica next October is looking pretty promising!! Well I need to get my shit in gear for the end of the month. Sorry about the lack of blogging. I would promise to write more, but we both know that is a lie. ;) I will write when I can, and attempt to blog more than once a month.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Here is too a fabulous 2006!

Random Thoughts

2005-11-15T09:18:00.000-07:00

Well it has been a LONG time since I last blogged. Honestly things have been so busy I haven't had much time. I don't feel too great today. (EMPY gave me whatever germs she was carrying with her when she came to visit last weekend!) However I am SO happy she made the trip to spend time with me! THANKS FOR COMING OUT BUDDY!

Here is a picture of my Wrigley on Halloween. Isn't he a doll?!? EC and I dressed him and Goose up as Hot Dogs. They were good sports about it and let us take a dozen or so pictures of them. We had to work late on Halloween so we didn't get back to the house until 6:30 or so and most of the kids had already come and gone :(.

Wedding plans are coming along. Empy flew out this past weekend and we actually went to try on wedding dresses. It was VERY overwhelming for me. Once you are looking at yourself in a wedding gown and veil it is a reality check. I think I am still in shock over the fact that I am getting married. I am overwhelmed at the thought that EC is so wonderful and he picked me. Sometimes I think about what I did to deserve him. I am surprised at how overwhelmed I have felt on and off this past 2 months since we have been engaged. I just have to remember to take BIG DEEP breaths.

We started pre-marital counseling last night at our church. It was a great first session. I think it is a smart thing that we are doing this. I really like our church. EC wasn't too excited about going - but he warmed up to the idea and got something out of the session like I did. We have 3 classes left.

Work is going well. Turns out I am going to recover more money than originally thought - so maybe my chances of going to Costa Rica next year are pretty good after all! EC is excited b/c he will get to go on this trip next year if I win. Once I get my recovery points later this month it will throw me into the top 4. They are taking the top 20 managers & their spouses next year. If I can only hold on to the lead!

Mouse & her husband are moving to NM this weekend! I hope the move goes smoothly! I am glad she is working her way closer to CO as am I. Who knows maybe one day we will all end up back where we started! I would love to live in Loveland or Fort Collins, CO again. I do like Billings though and plan on staying here for awhile. It is a good, safe, clean, beautiful town.

Ok well I am off to take some Dayquil or something - I need to try to kick this cold in the early stages.

I will try to post more than once a month. Sorry about being MIA.

This song does it for me...

2005-11-01T16:43:00.000-07:00

This is my new favorite song..yep it does it for me if you know what I mean!

MUST BE DOIN' SOMETHING RIGHT
By: Billy Currington

A woman is mystery
A man just can't understand
Sometimes all it takes to please her
Is the touch of your hand
And other times
you gotta take it slow
And hold her all night long
Heaven knows there's so many ways
A man can go wrong

Must be doin' something right
I just heard you sigh (I love this line)
You leaned into my kiss
And closed those deep blue need you eyes
Don't know what I did
To earn a love like this, but baby,
I Must be doin' something right

Anywhere you wanna go Baby,
s how me the way
I'm open to suggestions Mmm,
whatever you say
Tonight's about giving you
What you want,
whatever it takes Girl,
I hope I'm on the right road
And judging by the smile on your face

Must be doin' something right
I just heard you sigh (I love this line)
You leaned into my kiss
And closed those deep blue need you eyes
Don't know what I did
To earn a love like this, but baby,
I Must be doin' something right

Ah, Baby Mmm...
I don't know what I did
To earn a love like this, but baby,
I Must be doin' something right

Must be doin' something right

(( All I can say is GIDDY UP!))

Wedding Page

2005-10-31T09:06:00.000-07:00

Sorry to make this short - but being the last day of the month I am SWAMPED! I will write about Bermuda later. It was gorgeous and I had the best time!!

Here is the link to our web page on the knot...

http://weddings.theknot.com/pwp/view/co_main.aspx?coupleid=3215045290270512

OH and EJB sucks. If he ever comes near EMPY again he will be kicked in the business!

Bermuda here I come ~

2005-10-13T15:04:00.000-06:00

That is right cats - I leave for Bermuda tomorrow night! Giddy UP! I cannot believe it is already here! I fly to Vegas tomorrow night - then catch a flight at midnight to DC. I land about 7:20am EST and then catch the flight to Bermuda!!! It is A LOT of traveling - and I am not one for long flights (I get ancy and SUPER bored) but I am looking forward to it! The entire week is planned out for us. I will be sailing, swimming with dolphins and can finally use my scuba diving certification. I think I have to take a 30 min "refresher" course since it has been 3 years since I was certified - but I am SO excited!!!! I also plan to lay out and try to tan the whitest legs in America. From past experiences I have learned that I will forever be an albino and being tan is NOT in my future. I wish EC could come. If I win the trip next year he will be able to come with me though. Next year is a "Mystery Trip". They will give us clues every month until we figure it out. We just got our first clue:

Where will this year's mystery trip be?
It's not on an island because
It's between an ocean & a sea.
To speak Spanish would be a major plus
But if the ground starts shaking,
watch out for the volcanic rush!

Hmmmm - thoughts?!?!? All I know is a paid week of vacation - and an expense free trip sounds excellent to me!

Update on the wedding front:

*We have asked everyone in our bridal party to be a part of our special day (and they all accepted!)
*Picked the date= September 8, 2006
*Narrowed down the guest list to 140. - Originally we only wanted 75 - so much for that idea.
*Sent out all the Save the Date cards
*Booked the ceremony & reception site. Both will be at The Pines @ Genesee in Golden, CO.
* Booked A Music Plus as our DJ - already started to pick songs.
*Picked our first dance song: "Let's Stay Together" by Al Green.
* Bought everything "fallish" that I could get my hands on @ Michaels. The X-mas stuff is already out and in full effect!
*Booked a couple appts with florists & photographers for the day after Thanksgiving when EC and I are in town.
*Bought the flower girl dress (thanks Mouse!)
*Ordered the flower girl sash, ring bearer pillow & usher ties from Aria.
* Had a pow-wow with Empy about invitations - she is full of EXCELLENT ideas

So as you can see plans are in full swing!! So far it is pretty fun stuff!! My Mom is still the most dramatic person on the face of the earth. I seriously doubt at this point that she will even be there. She doesn't want to talk to me or help plan anything. Oh well - her loss. She sucks anyways. ;)

Now I must get back to work and get ready for tomorrow! I will post Bermuda pictures when I return!!!

Gena's Baby is here!!

2005-10-11T15:16:00.002-06:00

YAY!!! My good friend Gena just called to tell me all about her labor last week and let me know the baby is here and healthy!! Here are the stats:

Eastyn Abigail L***-P*****
8 lbs 8 oz, 20 inches long
Born: October 6, 2005

I just bought Eastyn the cutest bright pink baby blanket from Pottery Barn. I have decided I am obsessed with the Pottery Barn, and I must be stopped from continually buying things from there. :) Anywho...

CONGRATULATIONS to Gena, Dave & Maddi on the birth of Eastyn!!!

Long Time - no post...

2005-10-03T08:28:00.000-06:00

Whew - what a weekend. We moved into a brand new office building this weekend. Though it is really nice - I have never been so happy to see a MONDAY in my life. We had a normal work day on Friday and then worked from 5:30pm - 10:30pm. Sat 6:30am - 10:00pm, and yesterday from 6:30am - 9:pm. All I can say it was easily the LONGEST weekend of my life and I have never been so exhausted. I don't think I sat down for 5 minutes the whole weekend - and my feet and back are paying for it now! Good news is - my office is KICK ASS! All my new furniture is cherry wood and the fabric on the chairs is this khaki/sage color. It looks really nice. This is also the first office that has not overlooked the sales pit - which I am super happy about. Don't get me wrong - I love my sales guys, but most of them are loud & distracting. Ok enough about work.

As far as the engagement a couple weeks ago goes - EC was adorable. Basically he got down on one knee and told me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me - and that he loves me more than anything in the world and then said "Will you marry me?". It happened at an unexpected time and was perfect ;) Now that the overwhelmed feeling has subsided - I am SO excited! We are thinking September 8, 2006 in CO. Possibly Morrison or Evergreen, CO. I will keep you posted. We have our engagement pictures this weekend! I cannot believe things are already falling into place. I really haven't had too much time to plan just yet - but since I have known about the ring for 6 months I already have a pretty good idea of exactly what I want. I will post pictures when I have a chance.

Ok - my asst is out of town in Portland all week so I need to jet. I will write soon!!

It's Official!!

2005-09-19T16:44:00.000-06:00

Out of all these posts I HATE to make this one the "quick one" - but I had to get on here real quick and announce that I AM OFFICIALLY ENGAGED!!! YAHOO! EC asked me Friday night. I am a little overwhelmed - but very happy and excited! My ring is gorgeous, my fiance' is the most amazing man in the world - WHAT MORE COULD I ASK for?!?!?

I am in Missoula today & tomorrow. I left all my ring pictures at home - but will post one soon.

I will also post the engagement story as well when I have some time.

Well I am off to have dinner with customers...

P.S. We have decided our wedding colors & wedding party. It is a little hush hush until we can officially ask everyone. The only 2 people who have officially been asked is Jake to be EC's Best Man, and my brother Craig to be an usher.

I have PINED and lost sleep over who to ask to be in my wedding party- it might be the hardest thing I have to do during all the wedding planning. We are having a smaller ceremony (100 people) and everyone invited means the world to EC and I. I will keep you posted - More details to come... :)

Keith Urban Concert

2005-09-16T14:23:00.000-06:00

I went with DM & Teresa to the Keith Urban concert in Bozeman this past Tuesday night. It was a blast! Keith (though super short) is such a FOX! His entire band was so talented as well. I have to give props to DM for hooking us up with crazy good seats ;) The pictures are kinda dark - I am not a super photographer. Miranda Lambert opened for him. She was AWESOME! I was really impressed.

More Big Sky Pics

2005-09-16T14:14:00.000-06:00

This is a picture of my living room in my suite in Big Sky

A view from my bedroom. That is a chair lift in the background

My bed - It was fabulous!

The kitchen in my suite. Didn't use it - but it was nice!

Big Sky, MT

2005-09-16T14:03:00.000-06:00

This was taken right in front of my hotel in Big Sky. We stayed at a place called the Summit. It was incredible! I would move to Big Sky in a second. I was in a suite and it was awesome. Granted I really didn't spend anytime in there - but it was really nice!

ATTN: EJB

2005-09-08T09:44:00.000-06:00

UPDATE as of 9/12/05

Dear EJB:
I want to let you know that I am very happy you came out to see EMPY. You have really made her happy and I know she is sad to see you go. As long as EMPY is happy and smitten with you - that is all I can ask for. Thanks for coming out and making this weekend a great one for her. I take back all the threats to kick you in the business ;) Have a safe flight back to Dallas.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yes, you know who you are. I wanted to call this quick "Come to Jesus" meeting with you before you head out to CO for the weekend. Empy really cares for you and if you do any of the things on the list below- I will be forced to take the next flight down to Dallas and kick your arse!

1. Not show up all together. You have lied about coming before.. PLEASE don't do it again to her!
2. Not be totally honest about your feelings with her. She deserves that from you.
3. If you even think of leading her on in anyway I will be forced to kick you in the business.
4. Always be respectful.

EJB - She really likes you. I liked you as well back in November/ December, but then you pulled all your shit. After the no-show when she came to TX.. that kinda sealed the deal for me. Empy is my best friend - DON'T SCREW UP AGAIN. If you are leading her on, or don't have every intent to make her happy - then do us all a favor and don't come out & leave her alone. She is a great woman and deserves the best. Don't get me wrong - I am glad you are coming to CO - because she is on cloud 9 about seeing you. I just don't want you to hurt her again. Please don't hurt her again E.

Have a good weekend..............

I love this picture!

2005-09-08T09:28:00.000-06:00

Empy trying to keep her fingers from getting stuck

in all that hair! Empy was in rare form that night.

She basically had the entire crowd chanting her name! ;)

My Crazy Fall Schedule

2005-09-06T10:07:00.000-06:00

September 12-15 Big Sky, MT for my Reg. Mgmt Meeting (night of the 13th is the Keith Urban concert!) Hopefully this meeting is as fun as our last one in Fairmont Hot Springs.
September 19/20 - Missoula, MT office visit
September 21 - Kalispell, MT office visit
September 22 - Great Falls, MT office visit
September 23 - Helena, MT office visit
September 29-30 - We move into the new building! I got a corner office - giddy frickin' up! I will be sending out my new office info soon!!

October 4-6 - In Wyoming. Recruiting at the University of WY in Laramie. To all of my friends back in the Fort: I hope to make it down to see you - but so far it is not looking too promising since I am running the recruiting effort. If you can make it up to Laramie - we can make something work. =)
October 10-12 - In Chi-town for a Reg. Credit Mgmt meeting. (I will also get to see my sister! She is moving to Chicago to be with her BF Mikey on Sept 29)
October 15-22 - BERMUDA baby!! A week of laying in the sun?!? What more could I ask for?!?
October 25-27 - Bozeman, MT for my security seminar. I am running a seminar for our customers about security measures they can take to protect their business (which in turn ables us to be paid!)

November 23-26 - In Lone Tree, CO for Thanksgiving! We are only going to be in town for a few days. It will be nice to see the babies and my family though! I think we will actually be in Niwot at my Step-Grandmother's house for the big event. Yahoo for Niwot, CO.

Whew.... I think I have to visit my Great Falls & Missoula location somewhere in there too..Fun times for Jace!

My Fox!

2005-09-02T15:18:00.000-06:00

Here is MY personal fox after he got done playing Basketball last weekend. I think he looks so stinkn' cute in this picture!! What a hottie! I am so lucky! ;)

I S*ht you NOT!!

2005-09-02T14:33:00.000-06:00

Kyle Wyley & his manager just called me!! I was on a conference call and when I checked my messages there was Pam (his manager) & Kyle!! I think he said "Hey Jennifer - this is Kylie Wyley - how u doin' ". He said other things as well, but I am not sure what it was. Good thing I saved it so I can go back and listen to it again;) Anywho... It made my day! They left the number for me to call them back... but I think I will wait until work dies down a bit! Plus I am not totally sure what to say to them! I just pranced around my office a little bit - so I am sure everyone thinks I am crazy. Ah well...

P.S. This picture is from his website from when he was in NE I think. He looks SUPER cute (doesn't take much) and I just think goats are funny - so I picked this on to put on the blog.

Why I love the designer Justin Alexander!!

2005-08-30T10:28:00.000-06:00

This is another Justin Alexander dress I just LOVE! I never thought I would like all the poofs - but bring em' on! I love them!! This is my #2 choice!

I love this dress!!! I feel like I NEED to have it! Okay, okay so I am back browsing at wedding dresses again... I cannot help it. Plus it is not like EC needs to know about it!! This is my #1 choice as of today!

Bozeman

2005-08-24T16:26:00.000-06:00

I heart Bozeman. I am here today to visit cusomers and I LOVE THIS PLACE! I want to live here so badly! Besides the fact I am just happy to be in this city I am sitting right across from my Bozeman Mgr Fox and LOVIN' every minute. ;) Who knew mildly balding 33 year olds could be so gosh darn SEXY! RWWAAALLLL!!

Jess & Mikey

2005-08-22T14:54:00.000-06:00

Here is a picture of my sister Jessica and her boyfriend Mike. This was taken before the firework show in Chicago on July 4th! I have already met him and think he is a great guy. I will have to find and post the picture of him and I standing next to each other. We kinda look related and it is a tad creepy. Anywhoo... I am glad Jess found someone to love and who loves her. He is really not her type. He is educated, driven and has a good job. :) Nice change from her usual deadbeat, "artistic", full body tattooed, zero ambition, mooching of his parental units until he is 30 past boyfriends. She better not screw this one up!

My Dad

2005-08-18T11:17:00.000-06:00

I would just like to say that I feel really lucky that my Dad and I are so close. With all the crap that has gone on in my family for the past 11 years - I am SO lucky to have him. He has become a really good friend, and someone I look up to. He calls me almost everyday to just check in or tell me a funny story about the babies. I am glad him and EC have become close as well. I already miss him!

When my Dad called me today he said they told Tate that they will get a puppy if she starts using the potty. She is a little over 3 and is still NOT potty-trained. I guess 3 isn't that old - but the kid is really tall and I am just glad I am not the one changing her!! If I have my way, my kids will be potty trained by the time they learn to walk :) I am not really into the whole changing diapers thing!! (REASON 204 why I am not ready to have a baby quite yet!) My Dad wants a chocolate lab. The kids would LOVE a dog - I hope they get one!

With You...

2005-08-16T15:11:00.000-06:00

I thought that I had been in love before
But something deep in my heart
Whispered to me there was something more
And now I know you were the missing part

With you
All my fears are gone
It’s like I’ve loved you all along
You’re the mirror to my soul

With you
I finally understand
Exactly who I am
It’s God’s forever plan to be with you

I can be myself, not pretend
Let my true colors show
Still you love me, Still you’re my best friend
Without a word
Without a doubt
I know

With you
All my fears are gone
It’s like I’ve loved you all along
You’re the mirror to my soul

With you
I finally understand
Exactly who I am
It’s God’s forever plan to be with you

I know its God’s forever plan to be with you

Kyle Wyley - My new Boyfriend

2005-08-15T09:54:00.000-06:00

All I can say is BUCKA! Teresa and I went to the Tracy Byrd concert on Friday night and Kyle Wyley an up and coming country music artist opened for him. Obviously from the picture you can tell he is pretty easy on the eyes. ;) The picture doesn't even do him justice - the man is BEAUTIFUL! Teresa and I went to the lounge he was playing after the concert and met him and talked to him for awhile. All I can say is he is gorgeous and very charming! Even more important is his voice. He has one of the best voices I have heard in awhile. He did a mix of songs which included some Elvis. His voice is so strong and powerful I know it is only a matter of time before a record label signs him. His website is www.kylewyley.com. Check him out if he is touring in your area. You will not be disappointed. Oh and grab a copy of his cd - it is EXCELLENT!!!

What can I say?!? I am SMITTEN! :)

Erik Elof Theobald Olsen

2005-08-11T09:34:00.000-06:00

I know this is kind of hard to see - but this is the collage I made for EC's Mom. When E and I went to NYC we went to Ellis Island and researched his maternal grandfather. We found A LOT of info on him!! His name was Erik Elof Theobald Olsen and he came to the States June 5, 1921. He was 16 years old and came from Copenhagen, Denmark. From the ship's manifest we found out he was blonde, blue eyed and 5'3"(SHORT!) His Brother in Law bought his ticket and his final destination was Glendive, IL. It was really interesting to see what the ship looked like and to see his signature upon arrival into Ellis Island. I highly recommend going to Ellis Island if you are making a trip to NY. It was my favorite part of the trip!

ECL & JCM

2005-08-10T16:34:00.000-06:00

I forgot to add this picture to my blog last month. It is a picture of E and I from Jake & Holli's wedding. I am just thankful I NEVER have to wear that bridesmaid dress again!! This was at the end of the dinner - so we were exhausted to say the least! It was a fun wedding - and we were both honored to be in it!

(Oh and on an engagment note: we are still not engaged. I know this part might make a few people gag - but at my Grandparent's 50th Anniversary party he did lean over to me and say "We will be celebrating our 50th in 2056" - He gets the sappy award for that one :P )

Giddy Fricking Up!

2005-08-10T16:25:00.000-06:00

It is OFFICIAL- I won the trip to Bermuda!!! I will be there from Oct 15-22 WOOHOO! You can read my post below for the details and the link to the resort, but I just wanted to post that I got the call and I am going! I wish EC could go - but I will spend the week scuba diving and laying out trying to become less of an albino so I am looking forward to it!

More pictures...

2005-08-10T13:35:00.000-06:00

Our view from dinner at the Rainbow Room. After dinner I actually ran into Conan O'Brien in the lobby!!!

My sweet Tate & EC at the train station in Greenwich, CT on our way to NYC for the day!

Jack at dinner wearing my glasses.
He is so stinkin' cute!

My Grandparents @ 30 Rockefeller Center

2005-08-10T11:33:00.000-06:00

Happy 50th Anniversary to my Grandparents! Aren't they the cutest?!?

Pics from the trip to NY & CT!

2005-08-10T11:25:00.000-06:00

My younger 6'1" brother Craig. Sorry Ladies - he has a girlfriend.

Craiger and my cousin Harrison who lives in Brussels. Jessica and Craig at the Metrazur in Grand Central Station.

Area vs. Senior?!?

2005-07-29T14:16:00.000-06:00

Well I just got a call from my RCM (Regional Credit Manager). My title is changing as of Aug 1, 2005. From Area Credit Manager to Senior Credit Manager. They are using the title of Area Credit Manager for a JR. RCM position. Under that is District & Senior followed by Credit Manager and Asst. Manager.

Besides a title change it doesn't mean much to me except that I am not important enough to hold and Area title. :( Oh well. Title - Schmitle.

It is our Fiscal Year end today... so things are crazy. I actually like it kinda crazy - keeps things interesting!

Oh and I need to send some good dog vibes south to Pootie. Her dog Rocky (aka Nugget) ran away last night. Everyone please send vibes that she finds the puppers!!

(((((((((((((FOUND DOG VIBES FOR POOF!!!!!!!))))))))))))))))))))

Awake

2005-07-27T09:27:00.000-06:00

I was looking through the pictures I posted and I realized I didn't have any pictures of my dogs when they were awake. So here is a picture of them the other night. Wrigley is holding some type of chewy. Aren't they super cute?!?!? I am SO in love with them!! The lady who we got Wrigley from has a little female pup left of her latest litter of BG's. She also has Shiffons for adoption (Shitzu-Griffons). Here is the link incase you want to check them out. http://www.critters.vcn.com/information.html I would get another Griffon from her in a second (if EC would let me!) She really does raise WONDERFUL dogs! If you go to the puppies sold page - you can see my little Wrigley towards the bottom!!

CJ & Wrigley

2005-07-25T11:20:00.000-06:00

This is CJ - EC's soon to be nephew (His sister's step-son) I love this kid! I miss him so much. He kept picking Wrigley up and asking me to take his picture.. so here he is! We hope CJ will come to visit us in Montana soon!

On another note: I have NO idea why you have to scroll down to see my posts. I tried to fix it and cannot! Hopefully Blogger will fix it soon!

My hair for the wedding

2005-07-25T11:11:00.000-06:00

2 hours and 192 bobby pins later my hair was done!! I actually really liked it!!

My Boys

2005-07-25T11:07:00.000-06:00

This was July 4th at EC's mom's house in IL. EC was hung over and the pups were just as tired.. aren't they so cute?!?

Gotta Love it!

2005-07-22T16:22:00.000-06:00

This was from New Years eve a few years ago...this picture cracks me up! That is Patch in the ronald mc donald get up, and some random guy named Brian in the middle (me on the right). It was about 2am at this point and Brian actually told me "I will meet you down in your bed in a few minutes". I literally had to do a double take and ask him what he said. He kinda smirked and winked at me. I had to corral Patch and tell him to distract Brian so I could run downstairs and lock my door. Thanks for taking one for the team Patch!! This picture was taken right before I bolted downstairs. I think Brian ended up spending the night on Patch's floor that night.

I'm moving on....

2005-07-22T16:18:00.000-06:00

By:RF

I've dealt with my ghosts

and I've faced all my demons

Finally content

with a past I regret

I've found you find strength

in your moments of weakness

For once I'm at peace with myself

I've been burdened with blame,

trapped in the past for too long

I'm movin' on

I've lived in this place

and I know all the faces

Each one is different

but they're always the same

They mean me no harm

but it's time that I face it

They'll never allow me to change

But I never dreamed

home would end up where I don't belong

I'm movin' on

At last I can see

life has been patiently waiting for me

And I know there's no guarantees,

but I'm not alone

There comes a time

in everyone's life

When all you can see are the years passing by

And I have made up my mind

that those days are gone

I sold what I could

and packed what I couldn't

Stopped to fill up on my way out of town

I've loved like I should

but lived like I shouldn't

I had to lose everything to find out

Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road

I'm movin' on

Hilarious

2005-07-22T14:59:00.000-06:00

http://poodlespam.blogspot.com/

Please go here.... This is one of my good friends from HS's webpage. Funniest thing I have seen in a LONG time.

My little princess

2005-07-22T10:09:00.000-06:00

Here is my sister Tate. This was back from Feb 2005 as well. She just turned 3 on June 18. She is such a doll - I am SO in love!

Mr. JP

2005-07-22T10:06:00.000-06:00

Here is my little brother Jack. This was back from Feb 2005 -He is so much bigger now! I cannot believe he will be 2 in a few months!!!

Gosh they are super cute!

2005-07-22T09:57:00.000-06:00

Here is a picture of my sleeping model puppies! Thanks to Poof for teaching me how to post pictures!! Wrigley is on the Left - Goose on the right.

It's over

2005-07-21T16:15:00.000-06:00

Email from my Dad on 7/21/05:

I spoke with my attorney today. She heard from your mother's attorney relative to the college expenses and other matters. They contend that state colleges don't cost $10,000 per year and want backup documentation for your college expenses. Can you please contact the Bursar's offices at CSU and CU to get an accounting of tuition and other payments. Also, please contact your bank about statements for the years you were at school. Any information you can get will help. I will compensate you for the trouble.

Your mother, through her attorney, will ask the court for a 50/50 split on time with Craig, plus unlimited contact while he is under my care, plus visits to the school and King Soopers, etc. My attorney is suggesting that I contact the advocate with my concerns about her report. I am hoping that I can get her to consider a revision in her recommendations. Otherwise, I will need to challenge her in court. This will be difficult to do without your testimony. Things aren't looking very good for me at the moment. My attorney chalked it up to "gender bias". Evidently, when you are a mother, you are magically bestowed more rights than the father. Too bad for your brother...

I Love you both so much! Dad

**Why? Why is my family life like this. I am seriously so riled up at this point I just went into the bathroom at work and got sick. I am heartbroken for my Dad. I just spent the last 30 min on the phone with CSU trying to get payments and statments. I am so heartbroken.... I honestly am really sad. I cannot go on dealing with my Mom. I called her and tried to get her side of what was going on. She yelled at me and hung up. I cannot do this anymore.... Here is what I wrote to her - harsh maybe, but WTF do I do at this point? I feel like I am all alone in knowing what it is like to have a mother who is Bi-polar. To have a mother who has never thought I was good enough. :( I feel like I am a failure because my mother never really loved me. How can you NOT love your own child? What have I ever done? I was super involved through out school, joined a sorority partially b/c she wanted me too, dyed my hair blonde b/c she wanted me too, tried to mend things with my ex because she told me it was my fault he broke up with me, and I was more of a mother to my younger siblings then she ever was.... okay I am getting really upset I just need to stop. Here is the letter I wrote.

Now if I could just get over the guilt I feel for cutting her out forever.........but what else I am supposed to do?

Maggie,

I am at the point where I have to get over my guilt of cutting you out of my life and just do it. I am so upset that I actually just got sick in the bathroom at work. How many people do you have to hurt before you will stop? You’re right I don’t know your side. YOU won’t tell me your side. It comes down to the fact that you are incapable of loving me. Well you know what? I don’t need you. I have given you more chances then Jessica and Eryn combined to be a mother to me. You make me feel bad about myself and have caused me to always question your love for me. You have hurt me so bad that I am not sure I can ever get over the pain you have caused. Do not e-mail me, Do not call me, Do not write me mail. As of this e-mail we are through. Ask Jess – I have felt GUILTY over not talking to you since April…. well I need to get over it. You don’t deserve me. You don’t deserve a daughter who has accomplished as much as I have in my short 25 years. You don’t deserve a daughter who loved you unconditionally for too long. I hope you are happy – because of everything you have done you will miss my wedding, you will miss my life with Erik, you will miss being a part of your grandbabies lives. If you cared enough you would have talked to me – just more proof of the fact you are the most selfish human alive. For that I will NEVER forgive you. DO YOU HEAR ME?!? I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THE HURT AND PAIN YOU HAVE CAUSED ME THESE 10 YEARS!!! I have given you so many chances to redeem yourself – but you are too vain. Well screw you. I deserve more than that. DO YOU HEAR THAT?!? I DESERVE MORE THAN YOU. I DESERVE A MOTHER. Because of you I have clung on to every older woman in my life for guidance and a motherly figure. You were too busy being a “young single mother” as you call it. Well congratulations – you were so worried about yourself all these years that you just drove away your oldest child.

I will not welcome any attempts by your sisters or family to mend the bridge between us. You have to live with what you have done.

I am SO going to Bermuda!

2005-07-20T09:37:00.000-06:00

I am not sure if I have posted about this before - but my company takes the top 23 Credit Managers out of 189 to a trip every year. This year it is to Bermuda from Oct 15-22. I am ranked 12th nationwide and we only have 8 more business days left of the contest!! I am so excited! EC couldn’t go with me b/c we are not married and they will only take you and a spouse, but even with that said I am sure I will have a GREAT time. It is not 100% that I will get to go yet. I should find out no later than August 15th. I have a few more audit things that need to be figured into my final number like my bad debt needs to be .20% of sales (which it is) and we need to hit our NBBT (Net Before Bonus & Tax) goal. NBBT is the most important thing in the Ferguson world. I am not sure we are going to hit our NBBT goal for my entire territory – but I get points for 80% & 90% of the assigned goal – so I have a chance to get some points. There are always the few managers that sneak up at the last moment and get to go – I just hope I am far enough ahead that it won’t affect me!! If you click on the title it will take you to the place where we are staying. I will get to go scuba diving again - GIDDY FRICKING UP!

I need to get my passport and a couple cocktail dresses if I do make the trip. I am so pumped. Mouse, Poof, Empy – y’all should make the trip and we can have a girls night out every night – it would be a blast! Maybe I should actually work today and make sure my chances don’t slip out of my fingers….

On another note if my assistant AJ takes one more sick day I am going to box her ears!

I'm Baccckkkk

2005-07-13T13:53:00.000-06:00

I am staring at a pile of paperwork on my desk about 6 inches thick.. but I have decided to blog here instead being that I have neglected to write for so long. EC and I just got back from our vacation to WI & IL. Here is the low-down on the past 3 weeks…

EC and I left for WI & IL Friday July 1 about 1:00pm. We ended up spending the night in Fargo, ND and drove the rest of the way on the 2nd. In the midst of driving to Fargo I got a call from my sister telling me that my Mom had just gone to the court house and married my ex-step Dad. That is right EX-STEP DAD. Maybe 2 times is the charm eh? Anyway after I got off the phone with her I was shocked and EC looked at me and said “I have never known anyone to marry the same person twice before”. I had to laugh. To this moment my Mom has still not called to tell me she is married. She left some babbling message on my home answering machine on the 5th talking about how she was going on her honeymoon. I bet they went to crazy town – population – 2! She drives me nuts. I hope her and Daryl are happy together. I haven’t brought myself to call and congratulate her yet… I guess I am just trying to avoid more drama.

Turns out EC brought my engagement ring with him on our trip!! I have come to find out Carla was helping him plan something for me during the fireworks on the 4th. But unfortunately the cards are stacked against us – and I was not meant to be engaged yet. Here is what happened. #1 He wanted to call and ask my Dad, but my Dad & Lorie left for the cabin early and Erik didn’t have the number up there. (Carla told me this part). #2. Jake’s bachelor party was on the 3rd. Erik was running late to get up to WI and get him so instead of packing a few things to take up there – he brought his whole bag. The morning of the 4th when we were coming home – we got into Rockford and he remembered he left his bag at Jakes. Long story short – the ring was in the bag and everyone was too hung over to get the bag back to IL. EC ended up going to get it on July 5th in the morning. I found out about the ring because when Holli and I were riding around getting stuff ready for her wedding – she said to me “I saw your ring – it is gorgeous”. I was like “WHAT?!?”. She then backed out of the conversation as easy as she could. EC has no idea that I know he brought the ring. His sister does though. Carla and I had a heart to heart about it. She is just as confused to why he hasn’t done it as everyone. I am not worried… I was bummed about the 4th – but not ½ as sad as I thought I would be. I love him to death and know he will ask when he is ready.

EC looked absolutely GORGEOUS at the wedding. I cannot tell you how smitten I am! I didn’t see or talk to him until I walked down the isle with Timmy (one of the groomsmen) and Erik was standing at the alter all dressed up in his tux – I couldn’t stop smiling at him! I am telling you I am SO thankful after over 3 years that I was nervous to see him, and I got butterflies at the sight of him. We had a great time at the wedding. He danced with me the whole night! We have been practicing the 2 step and the pretzel at home and he even did that with me too! Being in a wedding is A LOT of work. I was surprised at how tired we were at the end of the night and we were not even the bride or the groom!! OH, OH, OH and I caught the bouquet!! That is twice in a row! I caught the bouquet at my good friend Mouse’s wedding last year. There was about 20 girls out there on the dance floor in front of Holli and I was standing off to the side not really paying any attention – when she threw it - it literally came right too me. I turned around and looked at EC and put up 2 fingers and winked at him. He was like “ I knew it… I knew no matter where you were – you would catch it”. I danced with the guy who caught the garter. His name is Patrick and was like 6’6” and was a CPA with Jake. I think we danced to the LONGEST song ever. He was nice - but on the verge of super dork.

The one thing I did take away from the wedding is that I do not want a big wedding. It didn’t seem intimate to me and Jake and Holli spent the whole night talking to people who they barely knew. EC is in full agreement. We want a small wedding with just our closet friends and immediate family.

Okay well the stack of paperwork isn’t getting any smaller – so back to work it is!

From here to Eternity Lyrics

2005-06-23T15:13:00.000-06:00

I LOVE this Michael Peterson song....

I did everything I could to get you here tonight
Without telling you why
Now girl if you only would, please hold out your hand
Just close your eyesI
've been dying to ask you one burning question
Will you be mine?

From here to eternity
I'm asking you to share your life with me
Now and forever I guarantee, I'll always stay by your side
I promise my love to youI
I'm willing and able and ready to
Whatever you needI am here for you, and I'll always be
From here to eternity

I saved a year for this ring I can't wait to see
How it looks on your hand
I'll give you everything that one woman needs
From a one woman man
I'll be strong I'll be tender a man of my word
I will be yours.

From here to eternity
I'm asking you to share your life with me
Now and forever I guarantee, I'll always stay by your side
I promise my love to you
I'm willing and able and ready to
Whatever you need I am here for you, and I'll always be
From here to eternity

3 years together!

2005-06-17T08:28:00.000-06:00

Well my night with EC was great! (No we are not engaged.......). We went to this fancy restaurant called the Rex in downtown Billings. The food was good, the service kinda sucked – but we sat outside and people watched and talked so it was a nice time. EC gave me a bunch of travel bags with my name engraved on a silver plate on the front of them – which is really nice! He thought one of them was a purse, but it turned out to be a makeup/overnight bag. With all my travel for work – it was a great gift!! He also got me a little red leather photo album (that fits in my purse) with a cute picture of the dogs in the front. He said “Now you can show off the boys where ever you go!” He is SO thoughtful! He bought a couple bottles of my favorite wine and we went back to the house, snuggled drank wine and watched “Hitch”. I loved the movie! It was so cute and Will Smith is a super fox! I was a tad disappointed about not getting engaged – but I am a okay with it. It was TOO OBVIOUS of a time to do it, and I know he would rather I be surprised some random day than expecting it. He does know that weddings take time to plan, and I think he is on board with a June wedding – so I will just have to sit back and be patient. Truth is – even if he never wanted to get married I wouldn’t leave him. He is such a rock in my life and I owe so much to him. He is a wonderful man, and I am just SO thankful I moved to Rockford, IL in 2002 and met him when I did!!

On another note. Two of our really good friends back in IL are now fathers just in time for father’s day!! Our friend Keith and his wife Carrie had a baby girl Kaley May on June 8, and our friend Darrin and his wife Rachel had a baby boy Jack Douglas on June 15. Congrats to them!! We will be able to see them and the babies the first week in July. I cannot wait!

3 Year Anniversary :)

2005-06-16T12:29:00.000-06:00

Well today is EC & my 3 year anniversary! I just got a dozen roses mixed with 12 daisies & 12 lilies delivered to my office!!!! It is BEAUTIFUL!! It is a HUGE arrangement! I cannot believe it! I am so lucky! We are doing dinner at the Rex tonight. I am about 98% sure an engagement is NOT in my future for this evening - but as of right now I am OK with that. (I might be a little sad tonight… we will see). They are so beautiful and they just made my day :) !!

I am so lucky to have EC in my life. He is such an amazing person and I know that he loves me. He is one of my best friends and I know I couldn’t go through this life without him.
Okay there is a HUGE bee in my office – so I need to go kill it! I will fill you in on the events of tonight- in a blog tomorrow!

OCD - yep I have the disorder

2005-06-15T10:52:00.000-06:00

Momma bought a year of Modern Bride and Bride's magazine. Let the planning begin!!!

I apologize for those of you saturated with wedding details... you know I love you :)

2 Concerts - Giddy Fricking up!

2005-06-14T11:01:00.000-06:00

God it feels good again to have a couple GOOD country artists in my country concert line up! Teresa and I are going to Tracy Byrd on Aug 12 in Billings, and then we are going to Keith Urban on Sept 13 in Bozeman. DM's buddy runs one of the venues in Bozeman and gave him 6 2nd row tickets!! IT will be DM, his wifey (first time meeting her - should be interesting), a customer and his wife, and Teresa and I. DM invited me to the concert after our night of dancing and drinking. I tried to get EC to go - his was SUPER un-interested, so I asked Teresa and she is on board! Then we are going to Big Sky Sept 14-16 for the next reg. mgmt meeting! Hopefully that will be just as fun as the Fairmont Hot Springs one. I requested a dance floor.. and my Controller (who is planning it) actually told me she will get one. We are even getting a band for a couple nights!! YAHOO!

DM and I haven't really been talking as much. Weird thing is when he came to Billings for the day a few weeks ago - I introduced him to EC for the first time. He was really nice and everything, but now he doesn't call me "just to chat and say hi" anymore. Maybe it is for the best who knows?!? One thing is my crush has worn off. It was just weird that he all of the sudden doesn't make the "friend" effort he did before. Oh well.

Well I am meeting Teresa for lunch today at this little mom and pop place called "Sugar & Spice". IT has awesome plain turkey sandwiches!!

We are going dancing tonight again at Montana Chad's. Tonight is West Coast Swing! I am ALL OVER IT! I hope my blonde hockey dancing buddy is there again. For whatever reason he always picks me to dance with ( I am not complaining.. he is super cute and is becoming an excellent dancer). I wish EC would go.. but again - no interest. So I will fill you in on the updates. IF there are no men there tonight then I will be sitting back and watching from afar. We will see how it goes.

MJ found NOT Guilty on ALL counts

2005-06-13T15:36:00.000-06:00

WTF?!? Are you kidding me?!? You have multiple young boys who can describe his genitalia in detail, people who actually saw these boys being molested... and you are telling me he is innocent?!? I think this is like an OJ/Robert Blake verdict. He may be found not guilty, but the majority of the world doesn't buy it. It kind of makes me sick to my stomach. Give him 2 years till he has kids in his bed again and we are back at it with more counts of molestation.

Any parent out there who would let their son stay at Neverland deserves to have their head examined. Someone needs to get Michael’s “kids” out of there ASAP as well. Who the hell let this guy be a parent?!?

Well that is just my 2 cents J

HE HAS A RING!!!!!!!

2005-06-06T10:20:00.000-06:00

Yep - It's official. EC bought the ring mid December and has been hiding it from me ever since!! Here is how I found out (not that great of a story):

Saturday: Around 1:00 I went to the mail box and low and behold there is a bill in there from the jeweler whereI tried on rings at a couple times. I brought it in the house and just showed it to him. EC got REALLY red in the face and said:

" you already have seen that before".
" no I haven't"
" yes - you have!"
"no I haven't"
" yes - you have - I am going to get us lunch"

With that he basically bolted out the door. I sat in the living room on the couch with my dogs and just looked at the bill. It ALL came together. This is why he drained almost 2k out of his savings acct, and then he must have financed the rest. His "secret payment" every month, the fact he is a mail Nazi around the 6th of the month....He has kept this from me for months!!

When he came back I asked him if we could talk about it, and he was like " sure - what do you want to know". I didn't really have anything to say, and he could tell I looked a little overwhelmed. He told me he was disappointed I got the mail and now 50% of the surprise was over. I could understand his disappointment. He said he did buy it BEFORE Christmas, and his Mom, sister and most of his friends know about it!! Even though I had a hunch -it is a totally different thing to know for sure. I really did feel overwhelmed for about an hour.

We are NOT engaged, and even though I know about the ring I don't think he will be asking anytime super soon. I am okay with that. I just want enough time to plan.

We did talk about the idea of getting married next June 16 on our actual anniversary date. It happens to fall on a Friday. Then we would go to Sandals or something for a honeymoon - who knows... anyway that is my big news from the weekend!

PS: Empy has a new love "JP". He seems really nice and she is a smitten kitten over him. So yahoo for her.

Gena's baby has a name!

2005-06-02T09:45:00.000-06:00

Gena and Dave have decided on a name for their baby girl due in a few months. They are going to name her Eastyn Abigail. Hopefully I will be able to see her in a month when we drive out to Wisconsin! I miss her so much! I sent her some cute baby girl stuff, and something for her daughter Maddi.

Anyway... I have a meeting with Conoco here in about 30 min - so I am outta here!

Sup

2005-06-01T16:37:00.000-06:00

Well b/c Empy blogged I decided I might as well blog a little myself. Honestly I have been super busy the past month so here is a super quick run down of the events:

Ft. Lauderdale: Went to the annual meeting. It was great! I had a lot of fun, and enjoyed just hanging out at the beach for half a day before returning to MT. My reg. manager was completely toasted on Sat night. Honestly I have a HARD time respecting someone who is my boss after I see him totally drunk and hitting on anyone with 2 legs.

Fairmont Hot Spring: Went there for my reg. meeting. I had a GREAT time. We got there on a Tuesday and most of the managers played a round of golf. We met them around 6:00 for drinks. After dinner we all went into the bar where they had live rock/country music and a dance floor. Turns out my favorite branch manager is an EXCELLENT country dancer. He asked me to dance and we basically danced until midnight. I had the BEST time! A couple of my other managers were dancing fools as well so I partied it up. I then went into the Hot Springs with my good friend Teresa and "DM" a.k.a my favorite branch manager and we hung out and had a couple good talks. Teresa ended up leaving and DM and I sat there talking about our significant others and basically life in general. I got up to leave about 1:30 and I think he stayed out there until at least 2 or 3. The meeting on Wednesday was REALLY LONG and super boring, but after that we all drank a little and I danced a couple songs and ended up going out to the Hot Springs with Teresa about 11. DM ended up going to and swam over to us and we basically just talked for an hour or so. We had meetings all Thursday too so I decided to call it a night and Teresa came with me. We got back to Billings around 3 on Friday. Over all it was a great meeting. I am looking forward to our next meeting in September in Big Sky, MT.

EC's sister and brother in law came out for Memorial day. We all went to our friend Dan's cabin in WY. It was a great time! We spent the days on ATV's and hiked all around. It was so fun! They left yesterday and I am sad to see them go. I really love EC's sister and consider her one of my closest friends.

Things back in CO are horrible still. I had to talk to the advocate for my brother yesterday. That is truly draining and heartbreaking. I cannot wait for this all to be over. I could blog about this for days – but I am emotionally drained on the subject.

My mom’s father is in the hospital and suffered a heart attack last week. They gave him through the weekend to live and said all his organs were slowly shutting down. I have had him in my prayers and I think everyone else has too – because he is still alive and from what I hear seems to be doing okay considering the circumstances.

The griffons are wonderful! They are my little love boys! We took a bunch of pictures of them in their matching flag bandanas (for Memorial day of course!) and they look like mini models!

EC and I are good. I am honestly OVER the whole engagement thing.- for now at least. The past month has been so hectic I have too much on my plate to worry about getting married. Plus with all the travel it made me think that maybe we are not ready yet. Who knows… all I know is that I feel really happy in the place I am today. No more worrying, not even as much as a concern to when it is going to happen. We love each other and that is all that matters. I have WAY too much going on right now – and maybe that is the best thing for me. Not like it made a huge heck of a difference but in talks with DM – he told me that he regrets getting married so young (22), and how him and his wife are SO different now. Not like I am 22, and EC and I are A LOT alike.. but the things he said got me thinking, and he had some good points. Maybe he is partly to blame or thank for my disinterest in getting married at the moment… I know I am just blabbing so I will stop now.

Okay well I am going to GO HOME and rest. I have had a horrible chest cold and momma needs to get rid of it once and for all!!

Peace

Thinking

2005-05-20T12:35:00.000-06:00

dm: our recent talks about music, life, work, our significant others, our favorite books really opened my eyes to where my life is, and what I want my life to be. I think you are great. You are so smart, and I am lucky to get to work with you. Thanks for all the dances and the cd. I know you said this was your favorite song... it will always remind me of you...

Well don’t you ever wish you could put off being young until you retire?
Wouldn’t that be something?
Live life backwards
Get dying over and then you just sit back
Your first twenty odd years
And laugh watching wrinkles disappear
After you got tired of retirement
You start work on your first day you’d get the gold watch
and a corner office
the brass plaque that says you’re the boss
you could start at the top and work your way down
first college, then high school, then just hanging out.

For the sake of it,
think of it,
what if we were able
to live life from the grave to the cradle?

And think about it – at 16 you really would know it all
–you’d have seen enough of life to know
the small things ain’t always as small as they feel
Like your hands on the steering wheel
and your first car while your Daddy co-signs,
and your Momma switching on the porch light peeking through the blinds
its your first date, first kiss, first time for all this.
First thing on your must do list would be to slow down
and enjoy the moments they go by so fast
and before you know it is your terrible twos
and as bad as it sounds your perfectly happy just crawling around.
You get instant attention the second you cry,
and you get to go out in the gleam of your old man’s eye.

Just for the sake of it,
think of it,
what if we were able
to live life from the grave to the cradle?

Oh tell me what would you change?

For the sake of it,
think of it,
what if we were able
to live life from the grave to the cradle?

Happy Birthday EC!!

2005-05-10T08:23:00.000-06:00

EC is the big 2-5 today!! YAHOO!! I bought him b-fast on the way to work and we are having a little party (little meaning EC, the dogs and I) after work. I got a cake for him, and his favorite ice cream!!! I love him so much - HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETHEART!

I am off to FL this week for my annual conference. Will be interesting. Anywho... my asst. is off until tomorrow so I am swamped... back to work!

Names...

2005-05-06T10:43:00.000-06:00

So my friend Gena sent out a list of names that she wanted our opinions on for her baby
(due 9/29) to a bunch of people on Tuesday and EC and I were included. I wanted to blog this so it is on the record the names that EC agrees with me on. Boys: Wyatt, Elijah, Owen, Abram & Noah. Girls: Lily & Jocelyn. Yahoo - he likes Lily! I am holding him to that one for sure. I am also starting to L-O-V-E the name Abram.

Anyway... Gena and her husband (or more like just Gena) has decided that for a boy it will 100% be Gage, and Annabelle or Isabelle for a girl. She finds out on 5/12 - she is so excited and I am SO excited for her!! She thinks it is a girl and I think it is a boy - we will see!!

Stroking the ego, feeling the flow

2005-05-06T08:39:00.000-06:00

This morning I had to drop my car off at the Toyota dealership so they could do some warranty work and fix my passenger side handle (it broke). Anyway with EC out of town I asked if they could drop me off with the shuttle. So my service guy was like sure and called for the driver to come and get me. So this guy comes out... pretty cute about 6'1" - dark hair, blue eyes, kinda had a scruffy beard like he just started growing one. He somewhat resembled a larger version of Matt Bowers for those of you who know who he is. He came up to me and was "the car is over here". So I followed him out and he open the door for me (what a gentleman) and I got in. Anyway he gets in the car and was like "Hi I am Stephen" so I introduced myself, and he asked me what kind of work I was having done on my car, and I tell him. He then is like - "hey - do you want to get a cup of coffee real quick - it is on the way". It took a second to register what he said - but when I saw the coffee kiosk to the right I was like "okay". I don't even like coffee.
Anyway he pulled around the kiosk and ordered some type of coffee drink - and like a 5 year old I got a hot chocolate. I gave him money, but he just looked at me and said "its $1.59 - I got it". It was really nice, but kinda freaked me out being that I had only met the guy literally 3 minutes ago. So we pull back on to the street and he asks me which places I like to go - I named a couple of the bars we had been too - and he was like "Do you like to go country dancing". I basically shouted "YES!". He then said he was new town and loved to go dancing too, but didn't really know of any good places. He then said and I quote, "I know this is kind of sudden but do you think you would like to go dancing sometime - I could give you my number and you could call me". We were about 5 minutes away from my work at this point - so I was like. "Thanks for the invite, but I have a boyfriend". His ears got really red and was like "I'm sorry - I am just new and want to see the town". I told him he could always come out with EC, and our group and he said he would like that. So I gave him one of my business cards and told him to call me at work sometime if he wanted to meet up with us... we will see if he calls. I thanked Stephen for the ride, and he said if I needed a ride back to the dealership he would come get me.

I was flattered. He seemed nice. So that is how my morning started out today - I am going to try to get a ride back from someone I work with this afternoon to get my car though. Giddy Up for Jace!!

**My sweet EC comes home tonight!! YAY!!

Click this to learn more about my Mother's disease

2005-05-04T10:57:00.000-06:00

If only should would get help, stay on her meds.

I troubles me to read that" People with bipolar disorder can lead healthy and productive lives when the illness is effectively treated (see below—"How Is Bipolar Disorder Treated?"). Without treatment, however, the natural course of bipolar disorder tends to worsen. Over time a person may suffer more frequent (more rapid-cycling) and more severe manic and depressive episodes than those experienced when the illness first appeared.5 "

Blogging for EMPY

2005-05-04T09:47:00.000-06:00

Empy has requested I blog... so here I am. I haven't been writing lately because all I really have to write about it the bad situation back home with my Mom. Long story short we are no longer speaking. For the time being I have cut all ties with her until she goes and gets help. She has really done it this time. I don't even want to get into it because I would have to write a novel to go over what has happened. As it stands now I don't want her in my life, and if she doesn't get help and get back on her medication she will never be a part of my life. I will not let her see my children, not let her help plan my wedding, or be a part of my adult life. I have had to live with her lies and deception for too long. I deserve better and she treats me like crap. I cannot handle anymore heartache from her. I just pray all the court proceedings go smoothly and Craiger ends up with my Dad – only my Dad. My Mom should be forced to get help before he can be in her care. Court date was scheduled for June 3, but last night my Dad told me they are pushing it back 2 weeks because the advocate needs more time to research all the claims to social services on the behalf of the 3 of us.

My Dad has been really great. I am SO lucky to have him. I am not sure what I would do without him. I know he is ready to move on with his life and get this out of the way!!

My sister in DC is doing so well! She loves it! I am so happy for her. She has really turned a new leaf and understands what it is like to be in the “real world” now. I am so proud of her!!

Other than that EC is in Sheridan, WY all this week for work. I leave next Wednesday for Ft. Lauderdale for a conference, and return that Sunday. Then I leave Monday for Bozeman and then to Fairmont Hot Springs up near Anaconda, MT. So lots of travel in the near future. Hopefully the FL weather is nice and I can actually try to acquire some kind of tan (if that is possible).

EC’s b-day is on the 10th!! He will be the big 2-5!! I got him a satellite radio with hook-ups for the house and the car so now he can hear EVERY Cubbies game this season. I think he will be happy with it! I hope so!

I hope my next post can be on a more positive note. I think things will be better for me with my Mom out of the picture.

Just call me Mrs. Tosh...

2005-04-27T12:38:00.000-06:00

So last night I was flipping through the stations and decided to watch Comedy Central present Daniel Tosh. All I can say is I was laughing so hard that I almost had a little Gatorade come out my nose. For those of you who know me - I had to do my typical plugging of the ears and nose at the same time just so I could swallow. He is REALLY funny, and a total fox so I have decided that I should mate with him :). He will be in Denver at the Comedy Works in July. I hope to go and see him live - he is hilarious.

Being the dork that I am... I wrote him an e-mail via his website and let him know of my intentions. Here is his auto response:

My New Best Friend:

Thank you very much for writing me at DanielTosh.com. You apparently have too much time on your hands and should look into doing some charity work.Unfortunately, this is an automated response. You honestly don’t think I have any time in my hectic schedule to personally respond to my millions of fans (ok hundreds… How many fans do you have?)Here are the answers to all of the questions you will ever ask: • 25-73 years old depending on when you read this. • Straight, usually. • No CD currently available, thank you for your interest but get off my back. A lot of work goes into producing and distributing an album and I didn’t get into stand-up to work. • I’m in New York City a lot, with a week to a months notice on the web site. • Have your schools campus activities board contact my college agent. I go where I’m booked. • College shows are usually free and opened to the public. I would just show up. • Curb Your Enthusiasm, and Chappelle Show. • Write 3-5 minutes of original material and find an open mic night. • About 9 years. • Yes, I love sushi. • That’s personal… I make a great living and I’m still miserable.

For those of you with questions that weren’t answered, please be patient. I do read every e-mail and I will personally reply in a brutally untimely fashion.Keep checking the site for updated appearance schedules, video clips, photos, and coming soon … my first comedy album.

Thank you again and now please stop bothering me.

Love you,Daniel

PS: Gemini, just in case you wondered.www.danieltosh.com

I think we are MEANT TO BE !

Just rambling......

2005-04-25T10:21:00.000-06:00

I know it has been a little bit since my last post, but things have been super busy. On top of that my Mom is up to her old crap again - so things have been stressful. Work is going well. I spent a few days in Rapid City, SD. We got a ton of snow last week - which proved to be GREAT for the yard!! We have our lawn guys coming out tomorrow to fertilize and get the grass looking wonderful!Then it was in the 70’s this weekend. EC and I spent most of the weekend outside and both got pretty sunburned. We had 2 contractors come by the house to give us price quotes on how much it would be to get the whole house re-painted. Not sure when we are actually going to get that done, but I think sooner than later.

One of my customers just came in to pay off her bill, and brought her twin daughters in with her. “Hallie & Jacey”. They are SUPER cute. Last time they were here I had lollypops in my office, so you could tell they were searching my desk for candy of some sort. I wish I had some to give them!! They are 3 and their Mom always has them dressed so cute, with their hair in little clippies. I have had MILD baby fever lately. I need to re-focus my energy on something else. Granted it is mild.. but it is still there. It actually goes in waves for me. Once I see Jack & Tate I get my baby fix and then don’t think anything of it… but I haven’t seen them since February so I can feel the baby fever coming back!! EC and I had been talking about trying to start a family late next year. But after finding out his sister wants to have a baby in the spring of 2007, he decided he wanted to let her “go at it” first and we could try in late 2007. Who knows… I figure it will happen when it is supposed too – whenever that is.

Okay back to work.. I have a dentist appt today at 2:15 – YICK! I hate the dentist.

Compliments on the side?!?

2005-04-11T13:14:00.000-06:00

Let me start off by saying that I love EC. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone or anything. He makes me laugh and I think he is a total fox. Once and awhile I do feel like I am not appreciated or that he is so comfortable in this relationship that he takes it all for granted. When I feel like he does this I find myself writing to certain people who I know will make me good about myself. For example there is this guy I have known for about 2 years named Jamison. He works for the same company I do, and I met him May '03 at out annual meeting in Nashville. He was very nice, and from the area so he showed me around and we became friends. Long story short - he came on to me the second to last day, I told him I had a bf and wasn't interested so he backed off. He was a total gentleman the whole time. Then I got back to my normal work routine and I would get e-mails telling me he feels like there was something between us, and it would be a shame not to see if we would be good together. I wrote him back telling him we could ONLY be friends. So he quit writing, but from time to time I would get other e-mails from him - usually he would sign them - "Thinking of you more than you know" Jamison. For whatever reason it always made me feel good. Is this wrong?!? I have about 3 other guys that I know if I write to them they will write me back telling me how much they miss me and hope we can all go out again soon. It makes me feel like I am desirable and that other men (besides EC) might find me attractive and want more than a friendship. Don't get me wrong - I would NEVER - I mean NEVER cheat on EC. I could never hurt him, nor would I want to be with anyone else… but I still like the attention of other men once in awhile.. even if it is over an e-mail or a phone call. I don’t think I am leading these guys on. They know of EC, and know I love him. Basically I feel like it is wrong to relish in the attention, but time after time I find myself writing them back. My friend can attest that I do not like the attention at all at bars, or clubs. Maybe because then it makes it “real” and creeps me out. Gosh who knows. Anyway.. here is the e-mail I got from Jamison today. I haven’t spoke to him in a couple months so this is out of the blue. Keep in mind I haven’t seen him for about a year and a half. This is also the e-mail that prompted my blog :

===(2)=== Text of letter follows =============================================
Received: 04/11/05 13:55 Opened: 04/11/05 15:02
From: Jamison D*****- TN
To: J******* *******l - MT
Date: 11 APR 2005

Hey there J:

I wanted to drop you a note to say hi and see how you are doing. It was about 80 degrees and sunny both Saturday and Sunday here, and I spent as much time outside as I could. I really like this time of year.

Also went and partied down on Lower Broad Friday night - hit some of the hardcore, locals-only honky tonks. I think you would have loved it. Just good acoustic country music. Awesome.

How about you? I haven’t heard from you in awhile. Let me know what's happening.

Hope all is well. Thinking about you (still thinking about you).

-Jamison

Am I wrong by liking the small bits of attention?!?

And another one of my friends is getting married...

2005-04-08T12:57:00.000-06:00

So this morning I had an e-mail from my friend Mark back in CO. I don't want to write out his full name, but his last name begins with a "K" and he dated "Pea" for awhile back when we were sophomores in college - for those of you who know who he is. Anyway the e-mail went a little something like " here is a picture of my new puppy - she is a bichon and her name is Breeze". I wrote him back telling him how cute I thought the dog was, and then he wrote back saying" I gave her to Kelly as a gift. I had an engraved tiffany's necklace around her neck asking Kelly to marry me. When she looked up I was down on one knee with a ring." OMG!#$%^&* So he is getting married June 24, 2006 in Colorado. He told me about 6 weeks ago that he was going to wait until Christmas to ask her - right around their 2 year anniversary. Wow.... well anyway congrats to Mark & Kelly.

We are going to the Nile Professional Bull Riders Invitational tomorrow night. I cannot wait!!! Should be a blast.

The Bozeman Mgr Fox is...

2005-04-06T15:06:00.000-06:00

Here is Billings... RRWAALLL!!! Seriously the guy is as cute as can be. He just surprised me in my office. He is here for a vendor alignment meeting. He drives one of the coolest trucks I have ever sees and has 3 super cute golden retrievers. He also lives on this HUGE ranch in Bozeman and has like 7-8 horses. We have a chemistry together - not like a sexual chemistry.. but we are both on the same page when it comes to work related stuff, like the same things and can talk for hours over business dinners and meetings. All I have to say is he is one super cute married bozeman fox!!!

Yahoo!

2005-04-06T13:21:00.000-06:00

Empy is coming to town on the 14th!! I am so excited to show her my house and for her to see the dogs!! She has yet to meet Wrigley and I think she is going to fall in love with him! I am SO excited!!! She is staying for 3 days!! I am not sure what I will have planned yet, but a full night of dancing it up at the Wild West Saloon is a must!! Plus there is a huge bar called the Red Door that is pretty nice - I think she will like that as well. YAHOO FOR ME, YAHOO for Empy. Oh - I am also setting her up with one of EC's friends Dan. He is super cute (but kinda young) 22 to be exact. He graduated from U of Wyoming last May and is a Mgmt trainee here in Billings. He is very Irish, VERY funny and I think they will hit it off.

EC & Dan bought shirts yesterday that had sayings from the movie Napoleon Dynamite on them. EC's says "Training to be a cage fighter" and Dan's says "Do the chickens have large talons?" They also had shirts that said " Vote for Pedro" " Your Mom goes to college" and "Give me some of your tots". Pretty funny if I do say so myself. They paid $18/each for them, when all they really are, are soft t-shirts with fuzzy stick on letters. I could make them and sell them for $10 and make a fortune :)

Other than that - things are okay here. Work is work, and home life back in CO is still hectic. Looking forward to this weekend when Dan, EC, Teresa and I are all going to the Nile Bull Riders Invitational!! Yeehaw!

God Bless PJP

2005-04-01T11:49:00.000-07:00

Charlie - The new Bachelor

2005-03-29T08:32:00.000-07:00

I was able to catch the last half of the Bachelor last night.. all I have to say about Charlie is WHAT A DOPE! Seriously I think ABC screwed themselves by going with him. I feel like I am now less intelligent for watching him interact and talk to the girls last night. He is an idiot!! What does he do for a living anyway? At least the other Bachelors actually had jobs. I think he just mooches of his parents and that fox of a brother Jerry. Anyway.. I doubt I will be watching this season – I don’t think I could bring myself to watch it week after week.

To save Craig...

2005-03-24T18:12:00.000-07:00

Well if you didn't think things could get worse at home they have... here is an update on the latest events:

Monday - 3/21: My Dad & Step-Mom officially filed their paperwork to make it so my brother could no longer see my mother based on a 17 page report my Dad put together. The judge granted the motion on Wednesday 3/23.

Wednesday - Motion is granted and my Mother is told until the hearing she is not to see Craig. Keep in mind, she did this to herself. If she wouldn't have filed the "eminent danger" paperwork, she would have been able to see him up to 4 times a week for 2 hours at a time. Once she filed that BS paperwork my Dad got fed up and went for blood. The HS my brother goes to was notified of the situation and told that he cannot go with her incase she shows up. About 2:30pm, my Mom shows up to the school asking the main office to call him down from class. Instead my Dad was notified. They had to turn my Mom away, and had an officer at the school escort her out. My Step-Mom went to the school and got my brother. He in now out of school until next Monday April 4th due to Spring Break, and the fact my parents pulled him out for the rest of the week.

Around 7:00pm last night my brother gets a call on his cell phone - turns out it is my Mom. He goes upstairs grabs an overnight bag and literally runs down the stairs telling my step-mom that my mom is outside and he is going with her because Wednesday night is her night. He literally ran out the door and jumped into my mom's car. (His story is he called my Mom and My ex-step-dad and told them to come get him because he didn't want to spend the night at my Dad's house. Craig also reminded me a few minutes ago that he is sixteen and chose to go wherever he wants.)

Back to the events of last night: my step-mom calls my dad who then tells her to call the police. They police are notified, review the court order. The police go to my mothers house and pick Craig up and bring him back to my Dad's house. Craig is VERY upset about all of this. I am sure my Mom was in hysterics.

Of course today when my Dad got home tonight he went to talk to Craig. Craig slammed his door shut on him. SO my Dad out of anger told him if he pulls another stunt like bolting out the door he will call the cops again, and again until he realizes he cannot do whatever he wants when he wants to.

There is an emergency court hearing tomorrow in regards to the custody of Craig. This will finalize sole custody during the time until they actually go to trial. I have been subpoenaed to the extent that I have to talk to the judge before the hearing on the phone about living with my mother in the past and what I have witnessed growing up. I was notified today that I have to be near my cell phone at 10:30am MST to talk to him. I have very mixed feelings about this. I am just going to tell the truth and tell him what I feel is best for Craiger. I just pray that my mother can accept what is going to happen and do the right thing and let my Dad raise him until he is 18. My mom had her chance.. she failed.

God please give me the strength to get through this, and to get my family through this. :( I just have to believe that God never gives you anything you cannot handle.

Finished the Book

2005-03-23T10:20:00.000-07:00

I finished the book "A Deadly Game" last night. Awesome read if you followed the Scott Peterson case at all. Lots of new information - It is about 480 pages and I read it in about 5 days on and off.. it is a fast read. Now I am starting the new book by Jane Green "The other woman".

It is snowy/rainy and cold here today. EC and I came in together. Good news is they FINALLY changed his pay and hours... however we are not exactly sure what his pay is yet. I got my controller involved and she called HQ to see what was going on. I guess he has been S45 (salary pay based of a 45 hour work week) on 3.12.05, along with his pay. NO ONE TOLD HIM, so he has only been working 8-8.5 hour days. So I ended up sending the e-mail I got from my controller to my P/GM and asking him to get with EC ASAP and tell him what he is making. I think EC is prepared to fight if he has to. I just hope the pay is what he promised.. then there will be no problems. I hate it when people promise to do something and don’t follow through on their promise.

Other than that.. everything else is A LOT better this week. The dogs are still kinda bad. Roo thinks he needs to get up at 1:30 in the middle of the night to go outside. If I don’t take him, then he has an accident in the house. We are going on over a week and a half of not 1 accident in the house!! Yahoo! His breeder e-mailed me yesterday. His parents Little Miss Hailey and Griffy had a puppy yesterday.. a little red rough female. It is not un-common for Brussels Griffons to only have 1 puppy at a time. They usually have anywhere from 1-3 pups and most of the time have to deliver via c-section. So Wrigley has 3 sisters now! I have seen pictures of his littermate sister “Maizie”. She is so cute!! I see her and want another griffon, then I go home and realize 2 dogs is enough!! (for now at least).

Better Day today...

2005-03-21T14:57:00.000-07:00

Could I possibly out of my 2 week bad mood?!? Today has proved to be a good day so far. Busy, but very productive. EC and I also got a lot done this weekend. We literally cleaned our house from top to bottom. He gets annoyed with me when I want to clean the guest rooms that no one is ever in.. but a little dusting and vacuuming never hurt anyone. I need to get someone out to the house to clean the windows. I HATE doing that for some reason. Maybe it is the potential of spiders - who knows. We also dyed Easter eggs... they came out SO cute!! All except the last one. EC and I were going back and forth to see who got to finish the last one... I gave in and let him do it. What did he do?!? He wrote "PENIS" on it with a wax crayon and then made the egg look flesh colored by mixing it in pink, orange and yellow... I was DISCUSTED! Needless to say he thought he was hilarious. His other egg creations included "Hi, I am an Egg" and "Please don't feed the eggs". He is pretty proud of himself.

I am reading "A Deadly Game" by Catherine Crier. It is VERY GOOD. Much better than Amber Frey's book, but then again very different. This gives more information on what was inadmissible in court. Peterson is an Ass Hat. There is no way he couldn't have done this heinous crime. I hope he gets the crap beaten out of him every day until he fulfils his sentence of death. The thing that KILLS me is the desperate women out there who have actually called San Quentin and proposed marriage to this killer. HELLO?!? He killed his wife and unborn son… what is wrong with this picture. Okay enough ranting about the Peterson case, again… I get worked up about it and could talk about it for days. EC listens to me go off.. but I think he is sick of hearing about it.. as I am sure most of America is.

Well back to the grind…

Things I need to get off my chest...

2005-03-17T17:15:00.000-07:00

I think this is the first time in 3 years that I have been in a "funk" for more than a few days. I am not sure what my problem is... I guess I could choke it up to lack of sleep, and stressful days at work - but who knows. Here are some things I just need to get of my head and on the screen.

1. I have been thinking more and more about not having a big wedding. Since I was 15 I wanted the 150-200 guests the big white dress and dance party.. but the past month I have been second guessing myself. My parents are so upset and so wrapped up in what is going on with my brother that I don't want to have a wedding during all of this. My Dad will have shelled out almost 30,000 at the end of this thing THIRTY THOUSAND DOLLARS. It just breaks my heart. I don't want him to have to pay for a wedding after he had paid out that money just to ensure my brother is in a good environment. Plus I really don't want all of them in a room together. They don't know how to get along. They don't know how to be adults and make it work for a day.

2. Why hasn't EC asked me to marry him?!? I am about 95% sure he has a ring. A culmination of things tells me he has had it since BEFORE X-mas. Plus I have a gut feeling deep down that he has it. I am not being snoopy at all - IN FACT I make an effort to help him cover his tracks so I don't find out for sure. It is ridiculous. We have talked about getting married next fall - that is fine and dandy.. but I don't see why he just won't ask. :(

3. EC is not aggressive at ALL in regards to work. Keep in mind he is fairly passive as it is in the real world anyway. He thinks if he works hard everyone will praise him and give him a good raise in due time. Well that is not the case with our company. Our P/GM has been giving him the run-around for 7 weeks now! I cannot handle it. This is affecting both of our finances. Because of this secret $200 payment he has had to make since Jan 10 – I have had to cover him on a few bills. He told me he will pay me back when he gets his tax return.. but it is the principle of it. It is really stressing me out. I cannot pay what I want to pay to my credit cards, because I have to make sure all the utility, cable and phone bills are paid. He needs to go up there and hold our P/GM accountable for his actions and make him pay him what he deserves. I don’t want to fight his battles.. but I feel like I need to. He is one of the best salesmen we have, he is overall one of the best employees the company has he need to get paid what he deserves. Why doesn’t he just see that?!? He needs to look our boss straight in the face for the 8th time, and just keep asking and asking until he gets what he wants. Hell – the boss man already told him he would give him a raise now EC needs to follow through.

4. I like my job.. but it is a stressful one. With over 15 locations and 6.8 million dollars on the books – I feel like I live and breathe my work sometimes. I feel like I get pulled in a different direction every few minutes………

Okay enough ranting. I just got an e-mail from my friend Jen. Her and her boyfriend have been together for 7 months and he asked her to marry him last week. They are getting married May 8th. May 8th?!? WTF?!? The e-mail went a little something like “we are getting married in South Dakota on May 8th” “We know most of you cannot be there – but that is fine, hopefully we will have a reception and see you there”. I would have liked to have gone………

Maybe next week will be better…

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

2005-03-17T09:00:00.000-07:00

Yahoo for the Irish! Being that I am Irish.. I decided to post a little about my family history today. My Mom's parents were both born in Ireland in 1923. Their families came to the US together in 1925 and eventually settled in Virginia. It is SO weird for me to think that they literally grew up together and have been married now for 60 years! My mom has a picture of them framed at her house of them on tricycles sitting outside the house my grandfather grew up in. Pretty cool! They had 6 kids; Caryn, Thomas Jr., Timothy, Constance, Mary Clare and Margaret (my mother).

My Dad's parents recently sent me our family history - at least what they have of it. Turns out my Pop-Pop's grandfather and grandmother were both born in Cork, Ireland. They moved to England when my Pop-Pop's mother Alice was 10 and lived there the rest of their lives. Alice met Anton (my great-grandfather) around 1915 and they were married a short time later. Anton’s family was French & German, but he grew up in England. They moved to the US sometime in the early 1920's. They had my grandfather Francis Donald in 1931. He grew up in Erie, PA. I think they had a total of like 8-9 kids.

My grandmother's grandparents were from Smolen, Sweden. They moved their family to the US I believe in the early 1900's. Her mother was born in the US, but her father was born in the Northern Ireland. His name was Rudolph (Rudy) Sandell. I am not sure when his family moved to the US. He met my great-grandma in 1930 and they were married the following year. My grandmother Patricia Jean was born in 1933. She grew up in Erie, PA. She has 2 younger siblings; Jerry & Sandra. She married my Pop-Pop in 1955 and my Dad (Craig) was born in 1956. They had 3 more boys; Christopher, Frank Jr. & Bradley.

Needless to say my grandparents on both sides moved their families to England for different reasons, and my parents ended up going to the same school, London Central. My Dad graduated in 1974, and moved to Albany, NY to go to RPI. My Mom soon followed in late 1975 and moved in with her older sister in Miami, FL. She finished up High School there and saw my Dad at least once a month. They were married in Columbus, OH in 1978. They had 3 kids Me, Jessica & Craig.

Well there is a little synopsis into my past history. Lots of Irish in there… so I feel it is my duty to go out and drink a green beer to my heritage!

Have a great day.

DEATH!

2005-03-16T11:45:00.000-07:00

Well SP is off to SQ where he will eventually be put to death. What a waste of a human being.... how ANYONE could kill their wife and baby is incomprehensible to me. May he rot in hell for what he has done. Thank goodness justice was served.

'You're going to burn in hell'
Peterson sentenced to death; wife's family explodes in courtroom
Wednesday, March 16, 2005 Posted: 1:43 PM EST (1843 GMT)

The jury that convicted Scott Peterson recommended he receive the death penalty.

REDWOOD CITY, California (CNN) -- Calling the deaths of a pregnant wife and her fetus "cruel, uncaring, heartless and callous," a California judge Wednesday sentenced Scott Peterson to die by lethal injection for the crime.
San Mateo Superior Court Judge Alfred Delucchi noted that the couple's unborn child never had a chance to draw a breath. He made the remarks as he denied an automatic motion to mitigate Peterson's sentence.
Delucchi also denied a motion filed by defense attorney Mark Geragos seeking a new trial for Peterson.
Members of Laci Peterson's family addressed the court before Delucchi formally imposed the sentence.
"You're evil and still have the readiness to commit evil," brother Brent Rocha told Peterson. "How does it feel to be a baby killer?"
Rocha said that every time he comes to court, "I think that my sister's head is probably rolling around in the bottom of the bay."
He called Peterson "arrogant" and said it was time for him to face reality for his actions.
Other family members, such as Laci's father and stepfather, used profanity in addressing Peterson, resulting in an admonishment from Delucchi. In addition, after an outburst from Peterson's father, Lee, Delucchi threatened to have him removed from the courtroom. Lee Peterson had shouted at Brent Rocha that he was a liar.
"I never liked you," Dennis Rocha, Laci's stepfather, told Peterson. "You're going to burn in hell."
Laci's mother, Sharon Rocha, told Peterson he was "stupid, stupid to think you could get away with murder" and told him he had "no love, no feelings, no heart, no soul."
"You're selfish, heartless and self-centered," she said. "You're a coward and an evil murderer ... You're a coward and an evil murderer."
In imposing the death sentence, Delucchi followed the recommendation of a jury last December. (Jury recommendation)
Delucchi had the option of reducing his sentence to life in prison.
Earlier Wednesday, Peterson was brought into a California courtroom shackled at the waist, according to The Associated Press.
The former fertilizer salesman was escorted into San Mateo County Superior Court under heavy security, wearing a dark suit and handcuffs chained to his waist, the AP reported. Additionally, 10 of the 12 jurors who sentenced him to death in December sat in the jury box Wednesday, the AP reported.
Laci Peterson was eight months pregnant when she was reported missing on Christmas Eve 2002. Scott Peterson told police he had launched his boat at Berkeley Marina, about 80 miles from where the couple lives in Modesto, to fish in the bay that day.
Her body, and that of the fetus she carried, washed up separately on the shore in April, near where Peterson said he was fishing. A definitive cause of death was never determined.
Prosecutors said Peterson killed his wife in the couple's home on December 23 or 24, 2002, with an absence of blood in the house pointing to strangulation or smothering. They said Peterson -- who police learned was having an extramarital affair with massage therapist Amber Frey -- wanted to continue to live life as a freewheeling bachelor.
Peterson, 32, had the option of speaking on his own behalf during the sentencing. He has maintained his innocence in his wife's death. He is currently being held in the San Mateo County Jail in Redwood City, but will be moved to San Quentin State Prison if sentenced to death.
Last month, Peterson's defense attorneys filed a motion requesting a new trial on several grounds, including what they called newly discovered evidence.
That evidence stemmed from a telephone conversation involving an inmate at a California prison. The inmate's brother told him that Laci Peterson had walked up on a man who was burglarizing the house next door and that the man had verbally threatened her.
In their response, however, prosecutors claimed that evidence was not newly discovered, but that defense attorneys had known of it but failed to check it out properly.
"This is, once again, an all-too-familiar tactic on the part of the defense to twist the truth and make false claims," prosecutors said. "The defense conveniently fails to provide any admissible evidence on this point and instead relies on rumor and innuendo."
Prosecutors said the man who allegedly conducted the burglary was available to testify, but was not called to do so.
In his motion for a new trial, defense attorney Geragos claimed that Delucchi committed an error by dismissing two jurors during the trial. Three jurors were dismissed in all. Prosecutors, in their response, said the issue had already been handled during Peterson's trial and the defense claim was "a rehashing of prior arguments."
Geragos said in his 135-page filing that jurors were allowed to conduct their own unauthorized experiment with Peterson's boat. Prosecutors said the so-called experiment, in which the defense claimed two jurors got in the boat and one "jumped up and down," does not amount to the taking of new evidence.

When it rains it pours...

2005-03-15T14:24:00.000-07:00

A synopsis of the past 2 weeks of my life:

1. Had a big falling out with the girl who took over my position in Milwaukee, WI. Found out she was lying about me - called her out on it and had a HUGE argument on the phone. She actually said to me "I am pissed you are calling me out" and "thank you J, you just ruined my day".
2. Our garage door broke.. there goes another $300...
3. EC is having a heck of a time getting our P/GM to give him the pay increase he was promised last OCTOBER!!! Our P/GM is actually lying to EC, and giving him avenues that lead to nowhere. This makes EC super cranky, and turns him into a complete snoots.
4. It has gotten so bad back home in CO that when my Dad tells my brother he loves him, my brother actually responds with "Well I hate you".
5. My mom filed a motion with the court that my brother should be removed from my Dad's house because he is in “eminent danger”. WTF?!? She doesn’t even know what the word eminent means. Plus my Dad has never laid a hand on any of us kids.
6. I don't get any sleep because my dogs think they need to go outside every night around 2:30am, and then they try to bring their chewies on the bed and keep me up all night being obnoxious.

I am drained. I need some sleep, I need things back in CO to get better for my family....

:(

March Madness

2005-03-14T12:36:00.000-07:00

Well it is that time of year again when everyone at work freaks out to fill in their brackets and try to win some money over the NCAA tournament. This is my 4th year experiencing the craziness that goes along with it. For whatever reason growing up in CO no one seemed that into college basketball. In 2002 I was in VA for a recruiting trip and saw the craziness first hand for the first time. Ever since then I am hooked. My first year I basically based my picks over what cities I liked better, or which coach had a better name. Believe it or not, I won about $50 that year just randomly picking my teams. In 2003 I took more time analyzing the brackets and looking at SI.com to see what the experts thought. I was out early with a few huge upsets in the first couple rounds. I did better when I was picking teams based on the color of their jersey!! Last year I decided to copy my bracket off one of the experts that had a good history of picking the winners - ANOTHER big mistake!! Again I was out of the gamble by the sweet sixteen.
This year it is different! I have put thought into it.. but I am basically going with my gut instinct. Here is who I have going to the final 4:

Illinois for the Chicago bracket
Wake Forest for the Albuquerque bracket
N. Carolina for the Syracuse bracket
Kentucky for the Austin bracket

I have the Illini winning the dance!! I only have about $30 on this bracket, but if I win that is $550 in momma's pocket!!! I picked the Illini to go all the way because of a couple things:
1. They have been EC's favorite team forever
2. They ALMOST went undefeated
3. I have been watching them all season b/c of EC so I know all the guys and their stats.

Well wish me luck.. first round is 3/17-3/18 - GO ILLINI!!

American Idol

2005-03-14T09:38:00.000-07:00

Mario is out!! :( I cannot believe it. He was my pick to win the WHOLE thing. But Nikko Smith is back, and I think he is excellent as well.

Bummer...

Chris Ledoux

2005-03-10T13:45:00.000-07:00

God Bless Chris LeDoux....

Bozeman, Missoula, Kalispell, MT

2005-03-09T09:51:00.000-07:00

Sorry it has taken a couple days to post... things have been very busy with all the travel. Here is a little synopsis on what is going on now:

Monday - Bozeman: It is about a 2 hour drive from Billings. We had to visit customers and set them up on the FAST system. This lets them tap into our data base to look up product. We spent the day with Tim one of my outside salesmen. He is super cute, and easy to talk to. We were supposed to be out of Bozeman on our way to Missoula no later than 2:00pm. We didn't leave until around 4... so that put us in Missoula around 6:30 Monday night.

Tuesday - Missoula: Well typical Missoula day. IT SUCKED. The city is beautiful, the branch is less than ideal. Our new branch manager started a couple weeks ago. His name is Sheldon and he is from Park City, UT. SUPER NICE guy. Hopefully he can turn something around up there. My regional Ops mgr Tim was also there. We went to lunch and hashed out some of the tax verification issues, and were able to also start the budget for the 05-06 fiscal year. Teresa and I left Missoula to head to Kalispell around 2:30. The drive was SO pretty. You are in the middle of the mountains and basically follow Flathead lake all the way up to Kalispell which is only about 60 mi south of the Canadian border. We got to our hotel around 7pm. I was so tired!! I crashed around 10:15.

Wednesday - Kalispell: Well we are in the branch today. It is a fairly good size location. They are super profitable because of all the money up here in the surrounding cities. Everyone is building houses on the lake and it is turning quite a profit on our end. The branch mgr Jimmy is pretty nice. He talks 100 miles a minute and is somewhat hard to understand!! I heard rumors he has some type of wooden leg… he does limp, but I cannot confirm or deny those rumors yet. I will keep you posted on the status of Jimmy’s leg. I am sure you all care J We are leaving at noon to head to Great Falls. Map quest said it is about a 5 hour drive.. YICK!

Other than work talk.. everything else is good. EC and I bought a custom log cabin dog house for the griffons :) Goosey seems to like it, and Wrigley is not sure what to think. We went to a Home Improvement and Garden show last weekend - it was a blast!

EC's sister has decided to get married in Vegas now instead of Cancun so we can actually go!! I also convinced her to have it over Labor Day weekend!! She works for a bank so she gets like 5 weeks of vacation off a year, and she doesn’t realize the rest of us are not that lucky! I am so happy to go! EC and I are standing up for them, it should be a fun weekend!!

I will try to post from the other cities as I visit.

PEACE

Ugh! I am so frustrated....

2005-03-04T10:04:00.000-07:00

I just found out that my "mentor" Mark is being let go by our company. I AM SO UPSET by this. To make a long story short - he is a district manager, and was running the finance dept in one of our Illinois location. 2 years ago we opened up a location in Chicago (Addison to be exact) and they were so profitable, that Mark's location became a satellite location of Chicago instead of a main branch. The finance manager in Chicago has taken a promotion and is moving to San Diego, CA. Well the logical choice is to have Mark take over the Chicago location. But the manager there doesn't like Mark because he is too "passive". So they gave him the option to move to Lansing, MI to become a manager (no longer district). He cannot move. He has 3 kids and a wife with a really good teaching job. So when he said no to the position and asked what else he could do, they told him his last day will be May 30, 05. :( My heart is totally broken right now for him. He is a wonderful guy, and we have become close the past 3 years. This makes me feel like I am pretty indispensable here at FEI. If they want to do away with my position they can on a moments notice. I am an Area Manager, and I thought that carried more security - but since a District Manager has just been done away with… UGH it makes me SO mad! I hope he finds a great job, and everything works out for him. He is such a great guy.

On another note – I have to go visit customers who are in jeopardy of defaulting on their promise notes. Fun afternoon for me.. just tracking down the dead beats. Hopefully tonight EC and I are going out with 5-6 people from work to go to the Wild West Saloon. Yahoo Country Dancing!! I cannot wait!

I leave bright an early for Bozeman, MT Monday morning. I will write in my blog like I did on the last trip about all the different locations. I am really looking forward to going to Helena, MT. All the guys there are great!!

Have a good weekend.

A very productive day!

2005-03-01T14:05:00.000-07:00

So far today I have:

1. Finished all my reports for the beginning of the month
2. Reconciled all my GL drill downs
3. Went to get my Montana drivers license (It was $40.50!!! - RIP OFF)
4. Returned the flippies I got from Old Navy that I didn't like
5. Bought the new Jack Johnson cd (AWESOME) and George Strait's 50 number 1's cd.
6. Paid and mailed out all our bills
7. Got my car washed
8. Actually talked to JW for the first time since I ditched him when he came to Sheridan, WY.

A very productive day if you ask me- and it is only 2:00pm!! Go buy the new Jack Johnson.. it is fabulous!!! If I didn't have EC, and JJ wasn't married I would want to have his babies. :)

Disappointment...

2005-03-01T08:12:00.000-07:00

Well all I have to say is WTF to the Bachelorette finale... I cannot believe it?!? Worst ending ever!! Those poor guys, but I guess they knew what they signed up for. Charlie O'Connell is going to be the next bachelor. He is pretty cute... so I guess I will have to watch it. DAMN reality tv. :)

On another note I get a D- in matchmaking skills. I was going to set up EMPY and "R".. but it turns out he is married :( He got married last June, and though I am happy for him I would have like to hook them up. They would have been super cute together!

NOTE TO SELF: Make sure both parties are SINGLE before hooking them up.

The top 20 reasons I love EC...

2005-02-28T14:58:00.000-07:00

1. Because he is a Swedish Fox!
2. He tells me he loves me everyday
3. He is SO good to the dogs
4. Because he brings me a Mt. Dew when he knows I need a "caffeine fix"
5. Because he loves his family with all of his heart
6. He lets me talk about my friends all the time, and doesn't act bored
7. He is a great basketball player
8. Because he always picks up my little sister Tate and hugs her every time we see her.
9. He will clean up after the dogs if they have an accident because he doesn't want me to barf
10. He will cut chicken into small pieces before grilling it, because he knows that is how I like it.
11. Because he will watch "girly" movies with me.
12. He dances in the kitchen with me almost nightly.
13. He is a great listener
14. Because he is one of my best friends
15. Because he went back to school to finish his degree while working full time
16. He calms me down when I get upset about family issues
17. Because he lets Empy call him "Socks", among the many nicknames I have given him
18. Because he moved away from his friends and family for me, for us.
19. He is one of the funniest people I have ever met.
20. He makes me feel complete.

Sorry for the somewhat mushy post.. but EC is being super cute and wonderful today. So I just thought I would write down a few of the reasons why I love him :)

Straight or Curly?!?

2005-02-28T08:52:00.000-07:00

Why is it that when I wear my hair straight I get so much more attention from guys then when I wear my hair curly? Do men just like straight hair better? The past 2 weeks I have been wearing my hair straight again and I get more positive attention then I do when my hair is curly. EVEN FROM GUYS AT WORK. That is really weird to me because E/C and I work together, and a couple guys still totally flirt with me at work (which I actually cannot stand). So if someone could let me know why curly hair doesn't look as good as straight hair - I would love to know why. Or maybe it is just me. Maybe I look bad with curly hair... who knows.

Okay on another note. I had a great weekend with EC. We were able to grill outside it was so nice on SUNDAY!! The dogs were in heaven playing outside all day. We watched a little of the Oscars. I heart Jamie Foxx!!!

Teresa and I are starting our work out routine again after a 2 week hiatus. I don’t really want to go, but I know once I get back into the swing of things it will get easier. We also leave on our week long business trip next Monday.

I will be watching the Bachelor finale tonight! I think Jerry will win, though I still like Wendell & Ben even though they have been kicked off the show.

R wrote me!!!

2005-02-25T09:43:00.000-07:00

If you go back to my post on Nov 22, entitled "JW is married" - you will see where I have talked about him previously. I wish I could link you to it, but I am not sure how to do that. Anyway... HE WROTE ME! He is so nice!! I miss all the times we had dancing at the Sundance - he is a fantastic dancer. I told EC that he wrote me and EC said maybe R could show him a thing or two :) I almost want to hook EMPY up with him. He is just a FANTASTIC person, with such a good heart, and he is pretty darn good looking if I do say so myself. He is a tad on the skinny side, at least he was, but he has these ridiculous crystal blue eyes. I haven't heard from him in awhile.. so needless to say I am in shock.

PEACE...

Inverview with Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite)

2005-02-24T16:17:00.000-07:00

This is pretty funny if you have time to read it. I actually had to close the door to my office I was laughing so hard.

Jon Heder has had a few notable TV guest appearances in America for "Mad TV" and "Good Day L.A.". Napoleon Dynamite will be the first time many UK audiences will get to see him…

Q: In the production notes, it suggests that you regarded this as something of a role of a lifetime? Could you tell us about that please?
Jon Heder: I guess in a lot of different meanings. It’s the first feature film that I have done and it may be the role of my lifetime, I mean I have to accept the fact that I may be known for the rest of my life as the guy who plays the geek. And it’s the role of a lifetime because I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to top that kind of character, you know if another writer or director will come to me with another character as challenging.

Q: How did you create him?
John Heder:What I loved about him was not only the language that he speaks because it just reminded me of so many teenage kids, the mono syllabic “Huh” kind of way that they react to everything. But the body language.

Q:Did you study kids from your own youth and high school days?
Jon Heder: Yeah, it was just remembering observations. I drew a lot of inspiration from my younger brothers. I have two younger brothers and they inspired certain aspects, especially how he talks. But how he moves, I just thought… so what’s a kid going to look like when physically he’s got no balance, he would be horrible at sports, even though he thinks he’s amazing.

Q: And the hair… was it your own hair that was given a perm?
Jon Heder: It was permanent when I got it and those curls stay in, locked until you cut them off or let them grow out. When we shot the short film Peluca (the pre-cursor to Napoleon Dynamite) back in 2001, I kept it for a couple of months, and I liked playing with the hair and it was easy to maintain. But after we shot the feature-length film, it was like, this is my third perm so my hair was kind of fried and wasn’t very good so they actually permed it again and permed it straight which fried it even more so I looked like a lion… (I know how Jon feels!)

Q: I feel I should ask then, given what you just said, did you wear the outfit out?
Jon Heder: I never went out like that, with the cast. I mean when I had the hair, I washed it very little, I washed it I think three times through the whole month we shot. I couldn’t get it wet that often because it was the third perm. So we would style it up and part it so much, that if it was washed then it was much cleaner looking, much flatter. I hardly ever walked around in his outfit, I would never wear the moonboots and I would put on my own clothes. I didn’t wear the glasses and I would open my eyes.

Q: Were you a sports jock or were you more inclined to be a geek like the rest of us?
Jon Heder: I was probably more towards the geek. I was definitely not a sports jock. I wasn’t as clueless as Napoleon – he has no idea how dorky he is – I knew how dorky I was and I was kind of in between. I had a twin brother so we kind of had our clique… then we had other friends… we were friends with a lot of the popular kids but then we also had nerdy kids who were friends, it was kind of a blend.

Q: Were you identical twins? I’m wondering if you do that things that twins do: messing with teachers and pretending to be one another?
Jon Heder: We were identical, we did that more when we were in elementary school, not so much when we were growing up cause our teachers were smart.

Q: Was there any thought or hope of a franchise with this film? Is it a character you would like to play again, do you think he has some potential?
Jon Heder: He easily has potential for sequels or TV shows and all kinds of stuff. We always hear from fans “We want to see Napoleon in some more adventures”, so it would be easy to franchise. When we made it though, we were just simply making a film that we hoped would be bought some day and that large masses of people would see it, and so far that dream has come true in a lot of ways. But speaking in franchise terms, I don’t know, we’ll see what happens. I wouldn’t place bets on a sequel…but I guess I wouldn’t mind playing it again, especially if Jared Hess who wrote and directed it was involved.

Q: And play him within that world he inhabits just now?
Jon Heder: Well that world in Preston is going to stay that way for another good number of years so we don’t have to worry about that changing.

Q: So it’s beyond redemption?
Jon Heder: Well you know it’s its own form, it’s its own redemption really.

Q: The director claims that the scene with the cow being shot actually happened. Do you know the story behind that?
Jon Heder: I don’t know much, except that someone had seen it happen at one point. I don’t know how personal it was to Jared… I don’t think that any of his brothers were on the bus, but it did happen in real life as the kids were driving by on the bus so it kind of ruined them all.

Q: Why do you think the character of Napoleon has enjoyed such huge success in America?
Jon Heder: I think because maybe so many people are just sick of seeing so much emphasis being put on looks and how popular you are. Personally sometimes I’m just sick of seeing high school movies and the messages they give…. Celebrating the nerd liberates so many young people, and even old, it was very liberating for me.

Q: And I wondered what that situation was in your own case. I mean did you bake a cake to win the young lady of your dreams or did she send you a note saying yes I will go with you to the school dance?
Jon Heder: I did some nerdy stuff, but I never baked a cake. I think I sent her a pine cone with some lame picture. I was definitely awkward with the females, once again I wasn’t as awkward as Napoleon but I always was trying to hook up with the ladies and I didn’t always have the luck.

Q: One of the many tremendous scenes in the film is that thing that happens at dances, you get people just sitting there looking enviously at people who are having a good time dancing, whereas they’re too scared to make that step.
Jon Heder: Yeah, that was me at the dances. It was like you wanted to dance but at the same time you thought it would be nerdy to get up there and do it.

Q: Will your next film be something completely different?
Jon Heder: Well there’s the desire to get away. We’ll see, I would like to do some more comedy but I would like to do something a little more dramatic.

Q: Are there offers in the bag?
Jon Heder: Some offers…there have been a couple of offers or scripts that are basically very similar to Napoleon. And most of that stuff I am trying to stay away from. Obviously there is a certain dorkiness to some of the roles that I might be interested in but…

Q: What would you say was your comedic inspiration?
Jon Heder: In High School I loved Jim Carrey, I still love Jim Carrey, Will Ferrell… Jack Black a lot of those comedians are great. Dana Carvey, a lot of those guys… growing up in high school those were my comedic inspirations.

Q: How did the town of Preston receive the film?
Jon Heder: We went to the premiere in Preston. It was kind of both ways… I think a lot of the youngsters really loved it and some of the regular people were like: “Is this making fun of us?” so kind of a mixed reaction. Plus it was kind of hard as it’s such an old theatre: the sound was bad. But I hear now that they’re gearing up for school year, they’re going to be having steak-throwing competitions and doing this whole Napoleon kind of fayre at the High School, so I think that they’re really embracing it.

Q: Talking of steaks, tell us about that, how much did it hurt?
Jon Heder: It hurt, a lot. We did about four takes. The first two takes he completely missed cause he was a good distance away and it was actually John Gries who played Uncle Rico who threw the steak. The third one hit me in the armpit and then left this nasty meat juice on the shirt. And the fourth one he said ‘look I’m just going to throw it hard cause I can’. So he really threw it hard, it smacked and ripped my glasses off and I had this big bruise that we had to cover up with makeup. It hurt but luckily I stayed in character cause I was like I don’t know what I’m going to do if I crack up. There were two scenes where I had difficulty staying in character which was the Rex Kwon Do scene…I was busting up when Rex was doing his scene. And then when I’m throwing food at the llama, I was just laughing, I was actually throwing food at the llama, and we cut that out because there was not a clean shot.

Q: And your big dance?
Jon Heder: It was just ad-libbed, all improv.

Q: How tough was that? Because that’s got to be the mixture of two things: the blossoming of the geek and the dance steps that don’t look too bad at all.
Jon Heder: I like to dance and Jared knew that so he wrote that into the script and we just said hey let’s play some good music…some Jamiroquai. We both love that music. Take 3 takes and we’ll take the best of the best.

Q: Were there hours of research involved for the very important speech you make right at the beginning about the Loch Ness monster?
Jon Heder: There was research done when I was in elementary school and I had to do reports on the Loch Ness. But Jared actually said go ahead and make up your own stuff, he wrote some of it and was like, just start ad-libbing.

Q: How was the whole Sundance experience because it was a sensation at Sundance?
Jon Heder: It was insane. It was really cool… it was basically where everything happened for the film and for me. That was our ultimate goal, to get into Sundance, to get it seen by some serious studios. At the first screening, the people went nuts.

Q: Did you rub shoulders with any of the people that you admire from the movies?
Jon Heder: I didn’t really get to meet all that many, I met a lot of agents….

Q: Was it an emotional thing because that was possibly something that you thought you would never achieve in your career?
Jon Heder: I think as an emotion it was just overwhelming, I wasn’t crying or like ‘Oh my God’… It was very cool because of the potential opportunities I saw in the future and I was like gosh, I could be doing this or that in the future. But at the time who knew if audiences were going to like it, so I really didn’t start to realise until just this summer, when I saw people gobbling it up.

Q: Have you been in the theatre, hiding in the back, watching the audience’s reaction?
Jon Heder: I did that once or twice, more towards the beginning when it wasn’t as big so the reactions weren’t as big… but now

Q: What was it like working with Tina Majorino, who you may remember first as a child onscreen.
Jon Heder: We became very good friends and I asked her all the questions about what her experiences were like. So it was cool, really cool to work with her because it was the first film she had done in four years, she basically took a break. For her it was like revisiting so it was kind of a new experience for all of us. But yeah, she definitely worked on some big productions back in the day and we talked a lot about that. And the same with John Gries who played Rico, he’s never been in the limelight but he’s been in the film business for so long and doing so many odd jobs.

Q: How was the chicken scene to shoot?
Jon Heder: Yeah it was fun, I really liked that scene cause it was nasty and it really smelled bad and it was like I couldn’t eat chicken for a while and chickens, you know, smell like chicken. But it was like phew, I’m not supposed to be smelling this, is that the meat? Shouldn’t it be smelling like something else? But it was really fun to handle animals.

Q: Are you now an expert at identifying the peculiarities and …of the common law garden chicken?
Jon Heder: Yeah.

Q: Is that a country boy thing?
Jon Heder: That’s an FFA thing (Future Farmers of America).

Q: So that’s what that stands for, I was wondering.
Jon Heder: It’s a real thing… I was interested that they never really pointed that out in the film, it was just more of a background detail.

Q: Because you and Pedro both wear these jackets with the badges. Kind of like boy scouts who like farms.
Jon Heder: Yeah, that’s basically it… instead of going camping they taste test whole-milk, sounds like lots of fun.

Q: I believe you were an animation student…
Jon Heder: Yeah, I always wanted to get into film and I was studying film at the time we made the short film Peluca, and when we made Napoleon Dynamite, the whole time on the side I would audition for short student films… I was always somewhat interested in acting, but for me I was like look I’m not going to try and get jobs in acting unless I definitely am interested in continuing to do this type of work.

Q: In this age of mobile phones, the scene with the long phone cord, really made me laugh…
Jon Heder: I thought the funniest part was obviously that the home phone had a cord on it that was a mile long. Yeah, we grew up with the cord… nowadays I hardly have any cord phones… I think taking the phone round the corner was improvised. I just figured that Napoleon is the kind of guy that likes to keep his conversations private. I was just talking about my chapstick that no-one else touched. Kids are embarrassed when they have physical problems, especially chapped lips.

Q: Who do you think the film will appeal to?
Jon Heder: That’s a good question because when we made the film, our first impression was that it was going to most appeal to the 18-30 year old range cause a lot of us who made the film were mostly in our twenties. And you know there’s a lot of 80’s references in it and there’s a lot of early 90’s. Surprisingly the movie has really exploded with early teens… They are crazy about the movie… and then our age group started to realise oh it’s cool, it’s cool to like this movie and its funny.

Q: Did you ever consider the character of Napoleon as being mentally impaired?
Jon Heder: No, no, I think he’s socially impaired, he’s a social misfit. Although they’re bordering that line… both him and Kip I think. Kip even more in some ways. I mean it’s just he’s grown up in a different environment, and he’s a good kid and I don’t think technically he has any learning difficulties, just a little awkwardness that seeps into some of his other functions.

Q: Could you give us an indication of what happens in the ‘extra scene’ to the film which will be released later during the film’s release here?
Jon Heder: It was Fox Searchlight’s idea in the US to make an extra ending and then we wrote it, just basically so those who have seen it 3 or 4 times can go and see it another 3 or 4 times to see the extra ending. It’s a wedding between two of the characters…. But it’s just a chance to see all the characters again for a short time.

Genius Loves Company

2005-02-24T13:25:00.000-07:00

Go out and get the cd today! It is fantastic!! Oh and if you haven't seen the movie "Ray". You should see that too. EC and I rented it a couple weeks ago. It is sad, but very good.

For lunch I went to a place called "Jus Chilln' " It is like a Juice Stop. I got one with pineapple, oranges, bananas and strawberries - YUM!. The only problem is I hate it when I suck up a piece of a strawberry through the straw.. for whatever reason it grosses me out! See I have this gag reflex... and if something hits the back of my throat - I want to yack.

And on that note I am out...

Ready for EC to come home!!

2005-02-24T10:52:00.000-07:00

EC is running our Sheridan location until Monday, and I am SO ready for him to come home! They dogs were good last night, but Goose basically kept watch all night for him. Wrigley wants to lay next to your face, so that makes it a little tough to get comfortable. I kept tossing and turning because every time I moved I would wake one of them up, and they would get up and re-position.

No major plans for the weekend... EC and I are going to CostCo, looking for grills, and going to church. He also has his finals this weekend. He is so smart, I know he will do fine :)

I am listening to Ben Folds Five right now, watching my assistant scratch her back on my door....SHE IS ALWAYS SCRATCHING!!! YICK!

Kenny Chesney

2005-02-23T11:34:00.000-07:00

I just heard this Kenny Chesney song on the radio. I haven't heard it FORVER. When my ex and I broke up I kept the promise ring and lavaliere he gave me on a rubber band and kept it in my pocket for like 6 months (sad and ridiculous I know) but I thought that just maybe we would get back together and I could wear them again. I ended up throwing them both in the river once I moved to Rockford, but this song is one that I used to listen to when we broke up and it would make me cry. It is amazing how a song can take you back to a time in your life good or bad and stir up feelings all over again.

Well, I opened my heart,
and I let you in
I promised I’d never love again
And still doin’ what I’d said I’d do
Someday I might get over you

I wear my ring on a chain now,
instead of my hand
And I deal with your memories the best I can
I’ve even been out on a date or two
Someday I might get over you

Oh, I never thought I’d see it
But I think I see the light now
I know that what I have to do
Is get on with my life,
but I can’t take another day
I can’t face another night,
so I just take another breath
And let it go

If I could ever feel the way I felt
I’ll take a chance with someone else
And if my heart takes chances too
Someday I might get over you

Oh, I never thought I’d see it
But I think I see the light now
I know that what I have to do
Is get on with my life,
but I can’t take another day
I can’t face another night,
so I just take another breath
And let it go

Well, I opened my heart,
and I let you in
I promised I’d never love again
Right now it’s still somethin’ I can’t do
Someday I might get over you

Thought it may not be til my life is through
Someday I might get over you

The Santa Barbara Trip

2005-02-21T11:43:00.000-07:00

Well the SB trip was a lot of fun! I flew out on Thursday night, and EMPY flew out Friday morning. It rained the WHOLE time! It was ridonkulous (EMPY's new favorite word). We went to the SB Mission, Zaca Mesa winery, Curtis Winery and the Firestone Winery. We also watched Napoleon Dynamite & The Notebook. **WATCH THE NOTEBOOK WITH KLENNEX !!! **Mouse lives about 3 blocks from the ocean. It was SO nice to all be together and have a great weekend! I love those girls. I wish I could see them more often.

On another note... I was SUPER upset with EC on Friday night. He almost ruined my vacation. I won't really get into details, but he went out drinking at a bunch of bars and DROVE HOME DRUNK. I could have killed him. I hate when he drives home... we have a fight about every 6 months when he does it. He also danced with a couple girls. I have a problem with this for the following reasons:
1. He doesn't like it when I dance with guys.. so it is a double standard
2. I am pretty insecure when it comes to that stuff. I try to play it off like I am not, and I don’t care - but their are things about me that I am not 100% happy with. My ex left me for someone he thought was better and who is to say that EC won't one day decided to do the same. I guess dancing with the girls made my insecurities more apparent.

I love and trust EC, but I can never explain to you the hurt that I still feel today in regards to my ex. I saw a picture of him and his new girlfriend... he left me for someone who looks just like me, is a finance major, loves country music.. so my question to you is, that if that is who he wants to be with - then what was wrong with me?!? He basically chose someone almost exactly like me. He also named his dog the name that him and I picked out together.. Bodhi. It is just so weird. I can tell you I no longer have ANY feelings for him, hate or otherwise... but I can see the effects of what he did to me in my relationship now. Some times I think he really screwed me up. He made me very cautious, and made it so I feel like I need to hear “I love you” all the time for EC for validation – HOW SICK IS THAT?!?

I am VERY scared because I love EC so much, and if he up and left I don't want to go through what I went through in 2001. I am scared he will think the grass is greener and leave me and the dogs. He never gives me ANY indication he is unhappy or that he wants to leave, but my ex didn't either. I know this relationship is different, but because of my insecurities I get nervous. I wish relationships were filled with “for sure things”. But nothing is for sure. I also learned that as much as you think you are in control of your own life - someone can come in and drastically change it at a moments notice.

I wonder if I will ever be able to completely trust that EC loves me no matter what and wants to be with me despite my insecurities.

Santa Barbara Here I Come...

2005-02-17T09:57:00.000-07:00

My flight leaves at 6:30pm tonight for CA. I cannot wait! I am so excited to see my girls. I am coming down with a cough and sore throat again... ugh! Why do I have to work in a germ infested office?!? Everyone here is ALWAYS sick!

On a funny note: EC was "grooming" his hair line on the back of his neck this morning and the poor guy slipped and shaved part of the back line funny.. so now there looks like there is a big divit . I laughed for about 10 minutes when I saw it this morning. POOR GUY! It was damn funny!

Have a great weekend - PEACE

Napoleon Dynamite

2005-02-16T09:32:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have NOT seen this movie.. you have to rent it. I thought it was hilarious! I thought it was very funny - random at times, but very funny! After you watch it.. GOOGLE the lead actors name and look up pictures of what he really looks like. You wouldn't even know he played Napoleon if you saw him walking down the street. His name is Jon Heder.

Anyway..story of this post is to Netflix or rent Napoleon Dynamite!!

Morning

2005-02-15T07:57:00.000-07:00

Well Valentine's Day is come and gone. I came home to a bouquet of red and white flowers (very pretty). EC also got me a very sweet card. He ate wings & fries from the Outback, and I ate spaghetti-o's. So much for a romantic dinner at home. We did watch the Bachelorette. I think I like John Paul the best. Jerry is cute, but I think JP would make a better partner. I guess the both propose on the last episode...Reality TV... You've gotta love it.

I don't really want to be at work today. I am kinda tired. Looking forward to going to Santa Barbara on Thursday to see Mouse!

I will write later...

Ranting....

2005-02-14T13:14:00.000-07:00

I just need to post to get these things off my chest, and hopefully make myself feel better! Things are really screwed up back home in CO. First off my Mom and Dad are about to go head to head in a MAJOR custody battle over my 16 year old brother. My Dad has legal custody of Craig, and my Mom is only supposed to have him every other weekend. However my Mom convinced my brother he could live with her and move out of my Dad's place. She bribed him with a new i-pod, computer and a camera phone. The kid is 16.. of course he thinks it is a great idea to move over there. He also doesn't have to do any chores, take showers, do homework.. it is a paradise for him. He eats Pepperidge farm goldfish and hot dogs for dinner every night, and can play video games until 2am if he wants. Basically it is the WORST situation ever. My mom is NOT a good parent. She is not a good at being a friend either. She works for the Airlines so my brother is home alone 70% of the time without any supervision. I saw him a couple weeks ago and it broke my heart. The kid is about 6'2" now, and like 140lbs. His hair is really long and shaggy, and his skin is so bad :( When my sister and I were 16 we didn't have perfect skin either.. but his is the worst I have ever seen. He talks to my Mom like she is a dog, and she lets him. He has no respect for anyone. He has only been like this since November when he moved in with my Mom. My Dad has decided to fight for sole custody with my Mom only being allowed to be with him in the day for up to 4 hours at a time. I support my Dad 110%. My parents had to go to his parent-teacher conference last week. His highest grade is a 62%!!! You can attribute that to my Mom's fault as well as Craig. To see my little brother in this state makes me want to cry. He is such a good kid; he just has no direction anymore. My Dad has only seen him once since before Thanksgiving. I am happy my Dad is taking my Mom to court and is going to finally hold her accountable for once. In my heart of hearts the only reason I love her is because she is my Mom. I DO NOT LIKE HER AT ALL. I pray to GOD that Craig will go back and live with Dad. Please dear God let my Dad have Craig back!

On another note she is engaged. ASS! Apparently she has been since Dec and didn't tell me. I am VERY UPSET with her over it. She is engaged to her 2nd husband. They were divorced in 2002 after his f*&^ head of a son was caught assaulting Craig. They also had a bad domestic abusive relationship. She would scratch, bite and hit him, and one time he squeezed her arm so hard it left a huge bruise. (THIS IS REASON 419 WHY CRAIG SHOULDN'T LIVE THERE. HE IS WITNESSING A SCREWED UP REALTIONSHIP ON A DAILY BASIS). I refuse to go. She told me on the phone the reason she didn't tell me was because she knew I was waiting on an engagement. WAITING ON AN ENGAGEMENT?!? More like thought I was getting engaged over my birthday.. that is all. She makes me feel bad about myself. She hurts feelings, she is the most selfish person I have ever met, and part of the time I am SO sad she is the one I call Mom. I am just lucky I have a Dad who has become a big influence in my life. I am lucky to have a Dad who is my friend and who is more of a parent to me then my Mom has ever been.

Okay....enough of this rant.. it is Valentines Day for the love of GOD. I was chipper up until about an hour ago.

**Keep your fingers crossed all this court stuff plays out in the best interest of my brother. Keep him in your prayers as well. He needs all the help he can get.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2005-02-14T08:55:00.000-07:00

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone!!! I had a GREAT weekend. It was really low-key, but I EC and I had a good weekend together. We went looking for patio furniture, and a gas grill for our backyard. We found what we want.. now we just need to get the funds for it!

We also saw our CPA and had our taxes done. EC is getting a HUGE return, and I am left with a tiny small one. :( It always seems to go that way... OH WELL!

I hope everyone has a great Valentine's Day!!

PEACE

Gena is Pregnant!!

2005-02-11T14:52:00.000-07:00

I just found out my good friend Gena from Madison, WI is pregnant!! Her husband Dave and her have being going through IVF in hopes to have a baby. The first time they were unsuccessful, and she received the GOOD news about their second try today! She already has a daughter Maddi (8yrs), and wants another girl. I AM SO HAPPY FOR HER! She is due Sept 29th.

YAHOO 4 GENA!!!